The entire Book of Mosiah in the Book of Mormon deals with addiction and recovery, and we see a prime example in King Noah and his priests. The cycle of addiction begins with an "over-zealous" father (see Mosiah 7:21; 9:3) producing a rebellious son. I have listened to many an addict describe an over-zealous, fanatical style of parenting, and its contribution to rebellious, addicted children.
King Noah was a "wine-bibber" who "spent his time in riotous living" (Mosiah 11:14-15). I guess this was the politically correct term for alcoholic in his day. The reader is given a clue to the root of addiction as "he did walk after the desires of his own heart" (Mosiah 11:2). The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous would call this "self-will run riot."
We see the addiction progress as partying and reveling are replaced by the hallmark signs of advanced addiction. Let's examine the imagery later on.
"having searched in vain" (Mosiah 19:1)
Thankfully, one of King Noah's priests was paying attention to Abinadi, who comes to warn them of the inevitable bondage soon to occur. Alma was convinced of the words of Abinadi and flees into the wilderness, writes down the teachings of Abinadi, and goes about privately teaching the people until he has established a group of 450 followers (see Mosiah 18:35). Noah, enraged by this, sends an army after Alma and his followers, but "the army of the king returned, having searched in vain for the people of the Lord" (Mosiah 19:1).
As practicing addicts, our vain imagination and vain search of things to fill the empty place in the midst of our souls, lead us to alcohol, drugs, food, sex, gambling, and many other things, only to leave us hungrier, thirstier, and more in desperate want. In Twelve Step recovery this is often called "The God Hole." It is the emptiness only God can fill, while the depleted addict searches in vain.
"the forces of the king were small, having been reduced" (Mosiah 19:2)
In the beginning, alcohol was my liquid bravado. But over many years of hard drinking, the tables were turned, as it sapped my energy, depleted my drive, and just plain out made me sick and tired. I became unproductive and unmotivated, feeling a sense of defeat. I became "powerless over alcohol," having been reduced to a dependent drunk.
"there began to be a division" (Mosiah 19:2)
As addicts, we feel isolated from family, friends, and society. But it's almost like there's a division of the inner self. My body only craved my next fix, but my spirit held loftier aspirations. Alma would have a son (Alma the Younger) who expressed the turning point in his life by saying, "Yea, methought I saw, even as our father Lehi saw, God sitting upon his throne, surrounded with numberless concourses of angels, in the attitude of singing and praising their God; yea, and my soul did long to be there" (Alma 36:22).
I have friends in recovery who have been spiritually starved. Now they can't get enough of the temple, enough of the scriptures, and enough of the gospel in their lives. But they do get filled up!
"And the lesser part began to breathe out threatenings . . . and there began to be a great contention" (Mosiah 19:3)
There's not a more selfish creature than the practicing addict. (Just ask my sweet wife.) The Big Book says we are like the director of a play, trying to control and manipulate the actors on the stage of life. We will stoop to begging, threatening, extortion, and any form of manipulation and control--just to get our way. I have heard it said in AA, "Alcoholics don't have relationships, they just take hostages."
Contention is the result and the addict runs to his "drug of choice" to hide.
"swore in his wrath" (Mosiah 19:4)
The contention breeds wrath. In this Book of Mormon account, a righteous man named Gideon (his name means warrior or "one who cuts down") draws his sword on the king and swears in his wrath to slay him. But the anger cuts both ways. I remember my addiction robbing me of all the good emotions, but leaving fear, anger, and shame as my driving forces in life--not a good combination.
"when the king saw that he was about to overpower him, he fled and ran" (Mosiah 19:5)
We run away from anything challenging in life, however major or minor. In times of crisis, instead of turning to the Lord, we run to our drug of choice in an attempt to flee life.
"cried out in the anguish of his soul"
This can be the turning point in recovery, as we cry out to God for help. Unfortunately in my case, I had to play a few games of "Let's Make A Deal" first as I pleaded with God to spare my life (what was left of it) and in exchange I would quit drinking. But then I remembered the truth of Mark Twain's "Huckleberry Finn" as he said, "You can't pray a lie."
"the king was not so much concerned about his people as he was about his own life" (Mosiah 19:8)
It's never about others. It's only about me. I once heard a wise friend in AA describe his spiritual growth in this way. I will call him "John" to protect his anonymity. He said something like, "Back in my drinking days I could only think about John. Now after many years of recovery, I can actually stop and think about what's best for my wife or my daughter, and I can do this for about three or four minutes. Then I have to start thinking about John again."
Alcoholism is a deadly disease. But it's not really the alcohol. It's the "ism" at the end of the word that gets us. It stands for "I, Self, Me."
"men should leave their wives and their children, and flee" (Mosiah 19:11)
This is what King Noah commanded his men to do. But it's also what the voices inside our heads tell us to do, whether we are willing to acknowledge it or not. The result is broken families, destroyed marriages, and torn relationships. It's a good thing Twelve Step recovery also has family support meetings to heal relationships.
"their fair daughters should stand forth and plead" (Mosiah 19:13)
Relationships become codependent. Often it is a spouse who feels a need to cover up or make excuses for the addict. I know of some who have called in sick on behalf of a spouse to preserve their jobs.
"spare their lives, and took them captives" (Mosiah 19:15)
Some are not so lucky. Some go into captivity and lose their lives. I remember my first Wednesday Night Old Timers Meeting as I looked at Step Three: "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him." That was the last thing I wanted to do. Yet I really didn't have much of a life to give up. This ended up being the best decision I ever made, and I have to keep making it every day.
My Savior Jesus Christ gives me "newness of life" (see Romans 6:4).
"into the wilderness secretly" (Mosiah 19:18)
As we run to our drugs of choice, the secret wilderness carries us to shameful places and the darkest corners of the Internet. In AA we say, "You are only as sick as your secrets." I think the Big Book Chapter 5 entitled "How It Works" mentions honesty three times.
"they would seek revenge, and also perish with them" (Mosiah 19:19)
Addiction makes us vengeful and bitter with anyone who stands in the way. But it's a deadly game. I have seen many friends, both inside and outside of recovery, who have perished. It's so sad.
"caused that he should suffer, even unto death" (Mosiah 19:20)
Like many addicts, King Noah suffers death. And there is much suffering leading up to the final scene. But it doesn't have to end this way. You're probably sick of AA adages by now, but here's a final one. Alcoholism and addiction are like riding an elevator. You can get off at any floor. You don't have to hit rock bottom, although most of us do.
"made oath unto the King"
As sad as this story is, it doesn't have to end this way. There is recovery. I have taken the liberty to capitalize "King" and change the story. You really can make covenants with the King of kings, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. In another Book of Mormon story an earthly king speaks for a Heavenly King as he proclaims,
"And now, because of the covenant which ye have made ye shall be called the children of Christ, his sons, and his daughters; for behold, this day he hath spiritually begotten you; for ye say that your hearts are changed through faith on his name; therefore, ye are born of him and have become his sons and his daughters.
"And under this head ye are made free" (Mosiah 5:7-8).
It's a sweet deal. "Let go and let God."
Sunday, August 27, 2017
Sunday, August 13, 2017
Crucifying the Flesh
The Prophet Joseph Smith's mission was prophesied by Joseph of Egypt, who foretold that one of the purposes of the Book of Mormon was for "the convincing them of my word, which shall have already gone forth among them" (2 Nephi 3:11). Often in Latter-day Saint culture we think of the Bible to back up the Book of Mormon, but the inverse of this--the Book of Mormon to clarify, expand, and expound the Bible, is one of its main purposes.
Abinadi's commentary on an Isaiah Messianic prophecy is a prime example. I have found the abundance of pronouns in Isaiah 53 to be a real problem to understand what's going on. One verse particularly seems to have too many pronouns. The Isaiah verse reads,
"Yet it pleased the Lord to bruise him; he hath put him to grief: when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin, he shall see his seed, he shall prolong his days, and the pleasure of the Lord shall prosper in his hand" (Isaiah 53:10).
Who is "the Lord" here? Is it Heavenly Father being "pleased" in His Beloved Son, as in other verses? It sounds like the Father in this context. And it is, but perhaps not in the same way as one might imagine. It is not Heavenly Father in the original Hebrew. It is Jehovah--the "Word made flesh" (John 1:14). Click here for a link to the original Hebrew.
In this context, Jehovah is the Father and Jesus Christ the Son. The premortal Jehovah declared Himself as the Father and the Son to the brother of Jared. He said, "Behold, I am Jesus Christ. I am the Father and the Son. In me shall all mankind have life, and that eternally, even they who shall believe on my name; and they shall become my sons and my daughters" (Ether 3:14).
Abinadi explains this in the Book of Mormon:
"And because he dwelleth in flesh he shall be called the Son of God, and having subjected the flesh to the will of the Father, being the Father and the Son—
"The Father, because he was conceived by the power of God; and the Son, because of the flesh; thus becoming the Father and Son—
"And they are one God, yea, the very Eternal Father of heaven and of earth" (Mosiah 15:2-4).
The concept of "one God" in this case doesn't merely mean being one in purpose. Abinadi is describing Jehovah as "the Eternal Father" and Jesus Christ as the Son. Yes, subjecting to the will of Heavenly Father is true and important, but Jesus Christ always subjected His own will to the will of His eternal role as Jehovah, the God of the Old Testament. Thus, Isaiah can speak in the past tense of the will of Jehovah as the eternal Father, as surely as if it had already occurred in the flesh. Or, in other words, it's already a done deal. Some LDS scholars call this tense "prophetic perfect."
Does this have an implication for us as mere mortals? If Jesus set the perfect example by always subjecting His will to his premortal divine purposes as Jehovah, what could have been our premortal will? And what is our mission here on earth?
The next verse makes another comparison. Abinadi teaches, "And thus the flesh becoming subject to the Spirit, or the Son to the Father, being one God, suffereth temptation, and yieldeth not to the temptation, but suffereth himself to be mocked, and scourged, and cast out, and disowned by his people" (Mosiah 15:5).
The Spirit becomes the Father and the flesh becomes the Son. As I was working through the steps of recovery, a wonderful bishop once counseled me that whenever the flesh wars against the Spirit, the Spirit should always win. I have been far from perfect in following his advice, but I can testify of the power of this principle. I know I am happier when I follow the Spirit.
The real clincher comes two verses later: "Yea, even so he shall be led, crucified, and slain, the flesh becoming subject even unto death, the will of the Son being swallowed up in the will of the Father" (Mosiah 15:7).
Not only was Jesus willing to lay down His life and suffer death for all mankind, He was equally willing to allow the will of the flesh to be "swallowed up" in every case. Thus, He "suffereth temptation, and yieldeth not to the temptation."
Two verses of scripture and an apostolic quote come to mind. Paul taught this idea of crucifying the flesh, or the natural man or woman, on at least two occasions. He spoke of baptism as a covenant relationship with Jesus Christ and the baptismal font being in similitude to the grave.
In Romans he said, "Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life. . . Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin" (Romans 6:4,6). The "old man" of flesh is dead in the water.
Previously, Paul taught the Galatians about the "works of the flesh" and the "fruit of the Spirit." He said,
"Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,
"Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,
"Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like . . .
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
"Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
"And they that are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts" (Galatians 5:19-24).
Elder Neal A. Maxwell once said, "One of the best ways we can put 'off the natural man' is to starve him (Mosiah 3:19). Weakened, he is more easily dislodged. Otherwise, he insists on getting his ticket punched at every stop on the temptation train" (Neal A. Maxwell, "The Seventh Commandment: A Shield," Oct. 2001).
Sunday, August 6, 2017
"That Ye May Stand As Witnesses For Me Hereafter"
They say time flies when you're having fun, so I must have had a blast this past month as I see it's been a good month since I last posted. Work has been crazy and weekends short. I don't know about fun but I did have a birthday celebration on Monday July 31--a day that marks 28 years since my last drink of alcohol or use of drugs.
A loving God seems to have orchestrated my recovery from the beginning. The coincidental events of stumbling across the Twelve Steps in a drunken stupor, leading to two more years of "research" in a failed attempt of "moral inventory," to hitting rock bottom, to that fateful drive home, passing the same Alano Club, triggering the three words, "powerless over alcohol" from Step One, as my car swerved off the road into the parking lot, only to find the Monday Night Beginners' Meeting was ten minutes away. And the first person to greet me in that room, as I sat in solitary confinement, was a dear man now passed to the other side of the veil. But just weeks ago and nearly 28 years later, I was privileged to handle his Big Book at an LDS Twelve Step Meeting where his son now serves as our group facilitator.
Thirteen years of hard drinking and complete devotion to Satan's cycle of compulsion had stripped me of anything worthy or honorable. Seven years without a single sober day had left me destitute and wanting. Yet as those looming Steps stared me in the face, I recoiled in horror at the thought of returning to my Maker. I planned my negotiation strategy accordingly, trading real serenity for "half measures" and looked for the "easier, softer way."
Instead, the terms of God's contract meant turning my will and my life over to the very Being I had spent thirteen years running away from. Yet one meeting was enough evidence and flicker of hope as we held hands in a circle, citing the Serenity Prayer: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Then there was the chant: "Keep coming back. It works!" Does it? Will it? One gaze into their eyes told me they had something so much missing in my shattered life.
On the second day, God put a sponsor into my life. But I had to think why does he care if I'm drunk or sober? Another dear man on the other side of the veil, but on this day he said, "Brad, it's a simple program--90 meetings in 90 days and don't drink between meetings. Then after 90 days, if you don't like what you have, we'll refund your misery." Wow, a misery-back guarantee! Again, I could only do half of it. I could only go to a meeting every day.
They say, "A gut full of booze and a gut full of AA don't mix." So on July 31, 1989 I went home with the ultimate decision of either getting out of AA, or getting serious about the Steps and God's offer of a new life.
In my bedroom in solitary confinement, I learned of the reality of Satan with his quiver of lies like, "It's too late for you. You've gone too far. There's no hope for you now." Perhaps you've heard them. But it was my last shot.
Battle-torn, run down, and beaten up, this drunk fell down and somehow asked for the big one--one day of sobriety. It was such a long shot.
Immediately I felt a rush of sweet peacefulness and tranquility. But how is this possible? No, there was no voice, just a calming assurance that everything would work out.
Fast forward 28 years--July 31, 2017. Another "manic Monday" (Sorry, Bangles), but this time on the other side of the spectrum. Beginning with an extended version of the Serenity Prayer, this time praying for a sweet wife, a wonderful son, and a dear daughter serving as a missionary in Canada, spreading the news of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I boarded the train for work, while catching the morning sunrise with crimson-lined clouds, displaying pink-cloud sobriety and a happy birthday wish. The train halted in South Jordan just long enough to see a beautiful temple and memories of a day there as I knelt at an altar across from my sweetheart. The ordinance performed there would last a couple of minutes, but transcend eternity.
Time to exit at Salt Lake Central with the music playing in my ear, sounding like God speaking through the voice of Bob Dylan:
"How does it feel, how does it feel?
To be on your own, with no direction home
A complete unknown, like a rolling stone."
That was me 28 years ago. But on this Monday morning it feels real good. I remembered a verse:
"And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions" (Mosiah 24:14).
A loving God seems to have orchestrated my recovery from the beginning. The coincidental events of stumbling across the Twelve Steps in a drunken stupor, leading to two more years of "research" in a failed attempt of "moral inventory," to hitting rock bottom, to that fateful drive home, passing the same Alano Club, triggering the three words, "powerless over alcohol" from Step One, as my car swerved off the road into the parking lot, only to find the Monday Night Beginners' Meeting was ten minutes away. And the first person to greet me in that room, as I sat in solitary confinement, was a dear man now passed to the other side of the veil. But just weeks ago and nearly 28 years later, I was privileged to handle his Big Book at an LDS Twelve Step Meeting where his son now serves as our group facilitator.
Thirteen years of hard drinking and complete devotion to Satan's cycle of compulsion had stripped me of anything worthy or honorable. Seven years without a single sober day had left me destitute and wanting. Yet as those looming Steps stared me in the face, I recoiled in horror at the thought of returning to my Maker. I planned my negotiation strategy accordingly, trading real serenity for "half measures" and looked for the "easier, softer way."
Instead, the terms of God's contract meant turning my will and my life over to the very Being I had spent thirteen years running away from. Yet one meeting was enough evidence and flicker of hope as we held hands in a circle, citing the Serenity Prayer: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Then there was the chant: "Keep coming back. It works!" Does it? Will it? One gaze into their eyes told me they had something so much missing in my shattered life.
On the second day, God put a sponsor into my life. But I had to think why does he care if I'm drunk or sober? Another dear man on the other side of the veil, but on this day he said, "Brad, it's a simple program--90 meetings in 90 days and don't drink between meetings. Then after 90 days, if you don't like what you have, we'll refund your misery." Wow, a misery-back guarantee! Again, I could only do half of it. I could only go to a meeting every day.
They say, "A gut full of booze and a gut full of AA don't mix." So on July 31, 1989 I went home with the ultimate decision of either getting out of AA, or getting serious about the Steps and God's offer of a new life.
In my bedroom in solitary confinement, I learned of the reality of Satan with his quiver of lies like, "It's too late for you. You've gone too far. There's no hope for you now." Perhaps you've heard them. But it was my last shot.
Battle-torn, run down, and beaten up, this drunk fell down and somehow asked for the big one--one day of sobriety. It was such a long shot.
Immediately I felt a rush of sweet peacefulness and tranquility. But how is this possible? No, there was no voice, just a calming assurance that everything would work out.
Fast forward 28 years--July 31, 2017. Another "manic Monday" (Sorry, Bangles), but this time on the other side of the spectrum. Beginning with an extended version of the Serenity Prayer, this time praying for a sweet wife, a wonderful son, and a dear daughter serving as a missionary in Canada, spreading the news of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I boarded the train for work, while catching the morning sunrise with crimson-lined clouds, displaying pink-cloud sobriety and a happy birthday wish. The train halted in South Jordan just long enough to see a beautiful temple and memories of a day there as I knelt at an altar across from my sweetheart. The ordinance performed there would last a couple of minutes, but transcend eternity.
Time to exit at Salt Lake Central with the music playing in my ear, sounding like God speaking through the voice of Bob Dylan:
"How does it feel, how does it feel?
To be on your own, with no direction home
A complete unknown, like a rolling stone."
That was me 28 years ago. But on this Monday morning it feels real good. I remembered a verse:
"And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions" (Mosiah 24:14).
Sunday, July 2, 2017
With Jesus You Get The Whole Pie
In the Book of Mormon Abinadi quotes perhaps the most beautiful passage of Messianic prophecy found in the Old Testament. Isaiah prophesies regarding the mission of Jesus Christ, and while looking into the future, writes about the events of the Savior's life in the past tense.
"Surely he has borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows; yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
"But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed" (Mosiah 14:4-5; Isaiah 53:4-5).
Pierced Bread
There is an Old Testament connection to this verse. The word wounded is the Hebrew word chalal, meaning "to pierce or bore through." There is a related word, which is challah, mentioned in Levitical Priesthood sacrifices. It means "a pierced or punctured cake." Leviticus 2:4 states, "And if thou bring an oblation of a meat offering baken in the oven, it shall be unleavened cakes of fine flour mingled with oil, or unleavened wafers anointed with oil."
Anciently this was called "pierced bread." Cake is different from bread because the outside of a loaf of bread is smooth, but cake has little holes or perforations. The symbolism of the Savior's mission is remarkable. Gethsemane means "oil press" and this sacrifice is "mingled with and anointed with oil." The Garden of Gethsemane was used to produce such pure olive oil as the olives were placed in mesh bags and ground with large circular stones. The pure oil was pressed out of the tiny holes in the bags producing a reddish, brown liquid as it would first appear. Latter-day scripture reveals that Jesus bled from every pore (see D&C 19:18). Just as the ancient sacrifice was "anointed with oil," Jesus was "the Anointed One." That's what the word Christ or Messiah means.
I marvel at His sacrifice for me as I have the opportunity to partake of the sacrament, recalling the "pierced bread" of an earlier time.
Giving Away the Spoils of Victory
There is another aspect of this beautiful Messianic prophecy as it reads,
"He shall see the travail of his soul, and shall be satisfied; by his knowledge shall my righteous servant justify many; for he shall bear their iniquities.
"Therefore will I divide him a portion with the great, and he shall divide the spoil with the strong; because he hath poured out his soul unto death; and he was numbered with the transgressors; and he bore the sins of many, and made intercession for the transgressors" (Mosiah 14:11-12).
Often in scripture, the word travail is used to portray giving birth, as a woman in travail (see Genesis 38:27; Isaiah 54:1, Jeremiah 4:31; John 16:21). In a sense, that is what the Savior is doing for each of us. Verse 10 says, "he shall see his seed," or His spiritually begotten sons and daughters.
The word divide in the New Testament is sometimes translated from the Greek word merizo, meaning to cut in pieces like the sacrament. There is a term Bible scholars call a merism. It is the pairing of opposites like Alpha and Omega, the beginning and end, first and last, etc. The word merism is derived from the Greek merizo. But it's not just the beginning and the end and it's not just A and Z; it's everything in between. The word represents a totality and completeness. Perhaps think of this the next time the sacrament is passed to you. Christ wants to give you everything He has.
The verse above says, "He shall divide the spoil with the strong." In battles, the victorious side always got the "spoil"--the goods recovered in the battle. In Luke's account of Gethsemane it states, "And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground" (Luke 22:44). The Greek word for agony is agonia meaning "a contest."
Jesus won the contest and the victory prize. But, according to Isaiah, He "divides the spoil" or shares the prize in totality with His spiritually begotten sons and daughters. He "justifies many." Justification is your legal standing before God. Really, if you come unto Him, He will give you the whole pie. He will "fight your battles" (see D&C 105:14).
Actually, the legal case is recorded in D&C 45:3-5:
"Listen to him who is the advocate with the Father, who is pleading your cause before him—
"Saying: Father, behold the sufferings and death of him who did no sin, in whom thou wast well pleased; behold the blood of thy Son which was shed, the blood of him whom thou gavest that thyself might be glorified;
"Wherefore, Father, spare these my brethren that believe on my name, that they may come unto me and have everlasting life."
"Surely he has borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows; yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
"But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed" (Mosiah 14:4-5; Isaiah 53:4-5).
Pierced Bread
There is an Old Testament connection to this verse. The word wounded is the Hebrew word chalal, meaning "to pierce or bore through." There is a related word, which is challah, mentioned in Levitical Priesthood sacrifices. It means "a pierced or punctured cake." Leviticus 2:4 states, "And if thou bring an oblation of a meat offering baken in the oven, it shall be unleavened cakes of fine flour mingled with oil, or unleavened wafers anointed with oil."
Anciently this was called "pierced bread." Cake is different from bread because the outside of a loaf of bread is smooth, but cake has little holes or perforations. The symbolism of the Savior's mission is remarkable. Gethsemane means "oil press" and this sacrifice is "mingled with and anointed with oil." The Garden of Gethsemane was used to produce such pure olive oil as the olives were placed in mesh bags and ground with large circular stones. The pure oil was pressed out of the tiny holes in the bags producing a reddish, brown liquid as it would first appear. Latter-day scripture reveals that Jesus bled from every pore (see D&C 19:18). Just as the ancient sacrifice was "anointed with oil," Jesus was "the Anointed One." That's what the word Christ or Messiah means.
I marvel at His sacrifice for me as I have the opportunity to partake of the sacrament, recalling the "pierced bread" of an earlier time.
Giving Away the Spoils of Victory
There is another aspect of this beautiful Messianic prophecy as it reads,
"He shall see the travail of his soul, and shall be satisfied; by his knowledge shall my righteous servant justify many; for he shall bear their iniquities.
"Therefore will I divide him a portion with the great, and he shall divide the spoil with the strong; because he hath poured out his soul unto death; and he was numbered with the transgressors; and he bore the sins of many, and made intercession for the transgressors" (Mosiah 14:11-12).
Often in scripture, the word travail is used to portray giving birth, as a woman in travail (see Genesis 38:27; Isaiah 54:1, Jeremiah 4:31; John 16:21). In a sense, that is what the Savior is doing for each of us. Verse 10 says, "he shall see his seed," or His spiritually begotten sons and daughters.
The word divide in the New Testament is sometimes translated from the Greek word merizo, meaning to cut in pieces like the sacrament. There is a term Bible scholars call a merism. It is the pairing of opposites like Alpha and Omega, the beginning and end, first and last, etc. The word merism is derived from the Greek merizo. But it's not just the beginning and the end and it's not just A and Z; it's everything in between. The word represents a totality and completeness. Perhaps think of this the next time the sacrament is passed to you. Christ wants to give you everything He has.
The verse above says, "He shall divide the spoil with the strong." In battles, the victorious side always got the "spoil"--the goods recovered in the battle. In Luke's account of Gethsemane it states, "And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground" (Luke 22:44). The Greek word for agony is agonia meaning "a contest."
Jesus won the contest and the victory prize. But, according to Isaiah, He "divides the spoil" or shares the prize in totality with His spiritually begotten sons and daughters. He "justifies many." Justification is your legal standing before God. Really, if you come unto Him, He will give you the whole pie. He will "fight your battles" (see D&C 105:14).
Actually, the legal case is recorded in D&C 45:3-5:
"Listen to him who is the advocate with the Father, who is pleading your cause before him—
"Saying: Father, behold the sufferings and death of him who did no sin, in whom thou wast well pleased; behold the blood of thy Son which was shed, the blood of him whom thou gavest that thyself might be glorified;
"Wherefore, Father, spare these my brethren that believe on my name, that they may come unto me and have everlasting life."
Saturday, June 17, 2017
Rescue From The Whirlwind And The East Wind
The themes of addiction and recovery are prevalent through the entire Book of Mosiah in the Book of Mormon. In fact, every chapter has strong imagery of addiction and recovery. After King Benjamin teaches the Twelve Steps and the people make a covenant to take upon themselves the name of Christ, Ammon makes a Twelve Step call on the people of King Limhi who are in bondage.
These people are paying tribute money to their captors. I remember when a large chunk of my income went to support my addiction. My addictions consumed me, and every waking moment was spent thinking of how and when I could satisfy my addiction. These people had "many strugglings" (Mosiah 7:18) but to no avail. When I first saw the Twelve Steps through the window of the Alano Club, as I was walking to work on a hot summer morning thirty years ago, I pondered Step One. I convinced myself I could quit drinking when I was ready, even though I had not seen a sober day in five years. But two years later, when I was ready to quit, I found that my strugglings were in vain. I was truly powerless.
King Limhi gathers his people at the temple and proclaims this powerful promise of recovery:
"Therefore, lift up your heads, and rejoice, and put your trust in God, in that God who was the God of Abraham, and Isaac, and Jacob; and also, that God who brought the children of Israel out of the land of Egypt, and caused that they should walk through the Red Sea on dry ground, and fed them with manna that they might not perish in the wilderness; and many more things did he do for them" (Mosiah 7:19).
Abraham and Isaac were both rescued by Jehovah as they were strapped to altars (see Abraham 1:12-16; Genesis 22:9-12). Jacob was rescued from his brother, Esau, who sought his life, but later they were reconciled (see Genesis 27:41; 33:1-4). As we struggle with severe addiction, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob is our only hope for rescue and recovery.
I remember when I was forty days sober in a hotel room all alone in Washington DC. I searched the dresser drawers for a phone book to call AA and get myself to a meeting. I was alone, far from home, and very vulnerable. Instead, I found an in-room bar with my alcoholic beverage of choice staring me in the face. I did manage to leave the room, call a taxi, get to an AA meeting, and return, only to have the compulsion hit me with the force of a tornado. I could feel the overpowering compulsion, and I knew that once again I was powerless.
I remember kneeling down by the bed and pleading to God for help as I pounded my clenched fists on the bed. Suddenly I felt all my strength flow out of my body, felt a sense of peace and calm, and then I fell harmlessly asleep on my knees. With all the strength I could muster I somehow pulled myself into bed, fell asleep, and slept soundly with my enemy and beverage of choice in the same room. When I woke up the compulsion was gone and the storm was passed. I checked out of that hotel room five days later with an absolute assurance and testimony of the God of Abraham, and the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob.
King Limhi gives a warning from the Lord: "And again, he saith: If my people shall sow filthiness they shall reap the chaff thereof in the whirlwind; and the effect thereof is poison" (Mosiah 7:30). A whirlwind goes around and around in a vicious circle. Like the practicing addict in bondage who repeats the same senseless behavior over and over while expecting a different result, the whirlwind repeats its cycle over and over while never getting anywhere. We eventually become poisoned by our addictions.
The next verse gives a similar warning. "And again he saith: If my people shall sow filthiness they shall reap the east wind, which bringeth immediate destruction" (Mosiah 7:31). This is Middle Eastern imagery that Joseph Smith would not have been aware of. These people had descended from Jerusalem.
Map 6 shows Babylon due east of Jerusalem. In the original Greek of the New Testament, the word pneuma means wind, breath, or spirit. In some contexts it can be a representation of the manifestation of the Holy Ghost, such as on the Day of Pentecost when there was a "rushing mighty wind" (Acts 2:2). The "east wind," as a representation of the spirit of Babylon, blows across the Arabian Desert and destroys everything in its path. It withers the vegetation and causes "immediate destruction." Addiction does the same.
The end of this chapter in Mosiah has a powerful promise for the addict. There are two of these in Mosiah. The promise states,
"But if ye will turn to the Lord with full purpose of heart, and put your trust in him, and serve him with all diligence of mind, if ye do this, he will, according to his own will and pleasure, deliver you out of bondage" (Mosiah 7:33).
God, who provided a daily dose of manna, to sustain His children wandering in a wilderness, will keep the addict clean and sober--one day at a time.
These people are paying tribute money to their captors. I remember when a large chunk of my income went to support my addiction. My addictions consumed me, and every waking moment was spent thinking of how and when I could satisfy my addiction. These people had "many strugglings" (Mosiah 7:18) but to no avail. When I first saw the Twelve Steps through the window of the Alano Club, as I was walking to work on a hot summer morning thirty years ago, I pondered Step One. I convinced myself I could quit drinking when I was ready, even though I had not seen a sober day in five years. But two years later, when I was ready to quit, I found that my strugglings were in vain. I was truly powerless.
King Limhi gathers his people at the temple and proclaims this powerful promise of recovery:
"Therefore, lift up your heads, and rejoice, and put your trust in God, in that God who was the God of Abraham, and Isaac, and Jacob; and also, that God who brought the children of Israel out of the land of Egypt, and caused that they should walk through the Red Sea on dry ground, and fed them with manna that they might not perish in the wilderness; and many more things did he do for them" (Mosiah 7:19).
Abraham and Isaac were both rescued by Jehovah as they were strapped to altars (see Abraham 1:12-16; Genesis 22:9-12). Jacob was rescued from his brother, Esau, who sought his life, but later they were reconciled (see Genesis 27:41; 33:1-4). As we struggle with severe addiction, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob is our only hope for rescue and recovery.
I remember when I was forty days sober in a hotel room all alone in Washington DC. I searched the dresser drawers for a phone book to call AA and get myself to a meeting. I was alone, far from home, and very vulnerable. Instead, I found an in-room bar with my alcoholic beverage of choice staring me in the face. I did manage to leave the room, call a taxi, get to an AA meeting, and return, only to have the compulsion hit me with the force of a tornado. I could feel the overpowering compulsion, and I knew that once again I was powerless.
I remember kneeling down by the bed and pleading to God for help as I pounded my clenched fists on the bed. Suddenly I felt all my strength flow out of my body, felt a sense of peace and calm, and then I fell harmlessly asleep on my knees. With all the strength I could muster I somehow pulled myself into bed, fell asleep, and slept soundly with my enemy and beverage of choice in the same room. When I woke up the compulsion was gone and the storm was passed. I checked out of that hotel room five days later with an absolute assurance and testimony of the God of Abraham, and the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob.
King Limhi gives a warning from the Lord: "And again, he saith: If my people shall sow filthiness they shall reap the chaff thereof in the whirlwind; and the effect thereof is poison" (Mosiah 7:30). A whirlwind goes around and around in a vicious circle. Like the practicing addict in bondage who repeats the same senseless behavior over and over while expecting a different result, the whirlwind repeats its cycle over and over while never getting anywhere. We eventually become poisoned by our addictions.
The next verse gives a similar warning. "And again he saith: If my people shall sow filthiness they shall reap the east wind, which bringeth immediate destruction" (Mosiah 7:31). This is Middle Eastern imagery that Joseph Smith would not have been aware of. These people had descended from Jerusalem.
Map 6 shows Babylon due east of Jerusalem. In the original Greek of the New Testament, the word pneuma means wind, breath, or spirit. In some contexts it can be a representation of the manifestation of the Holy Ghost, such as on the Day of Pentecost when there was a "rushing mighty wind" (Acts 2:2). The "east wind," as a representation of the spirit of Babylon, blows across the Arabian Desert and destroys everything in its path. It withers the vegetation and causes "immediate destruction." Addiction does the same.
The end of this chapter in Mosiah has a powerful promise for the addict. There are two of these in Mosiah. The promise states,
"But if ye will turn to the Lord with full purpose of heart, and put your trust in him, and serve him with all diligence of mind, if ye do this, he will, according to his own will and pleasure, deliver you out of bondage" (Mosiah 7:33).
God, who provided a daily dose of manna, to sustain His children wandering in a wilderness, will keep the addict clean and sober--one day at a time.
Sunday, June 11, 2017
"This Day He Hath Spiritually Begotten You"
Perhaps even more significant than the appearance of the Twelve Steps of recovery within a single chapter, Mosiah chapter 4, is the context of King Benjamin's speech in the Book of Mormon. LDS scholars agree almost universally that this speech was held during the Feast of Tabernacles in the Old Testament. The references to sacrifice offerings, joy and thanksgiving, the coronation of a new king, the gathering, and dwelling in tents or tabernacles, definitely ties this event to one of the three required feasts of Passover, Feast of Weeks, or Feast of Tabernacles. Feast of Weeks (or Pentecost) was a single-day event and would not require pitching tents. Kingly coronations were held in conjunction with the Feast of Tabernacles, and dwelling in tents would match the requirement given in Leviticus.
Regarding the Feast of Tabernacles the Lord said, "Ye shall dwell in booths seven days; all that are Israelites born shall dwell in booths: That your generations may know that I made the children of Israel to dwell in booths, when I brought them out of the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God" (Leviticus 23:42-43).
Egypt was the "house of bondage" for the Israelites (see Exodus 20:2). Addiction is our house of bondage. If the Lord set up this feast as a symbol of recovery from addiction, then the events surrounding it, and particularly with King Benjamin's speech, are of paramount importance.
In Step Eleven we are seeking knowledge of God's will for us and to have the power to carry it out. Step Twelve speaks of a "spiritual awakening." The bridge between the Twelve Steps and a fullness of God's glory is the covenant path.
The name Benjamin means "son of the right hand." In what became known as "the Vision," Joseph Smith and Sidney Rigdon see Jesus Christ on the right hand of God the Father:
"For we saw him, even on the right hand of God; and we heard the voice bearing record that he is the Only Begotten of the Father—
"That by him, and through him, and of him, the worlds are and were created, and the inhabitants thereof are begotten sons and daughters unto God" (D&C 76:23-24).
King Benjamin becomes a type of Christ, who is the King of kings (Revelation 19:16). Later in "the Vision" it speaks of those who attain exaltation and godhood by saying, "They are they who are priests and kings (and priestesses and queens), who have received of his fulness, and of his glory . . . Wherefore, as it is written, they are gods, even the sons (and daughters) of God" (D&C 76:56,58).
Becoming a son or a daughter of God means to become a god in this context. To become a spiritually begotten son or daughter of Christ means to inherit what He has and become like He is. Verse 95 in "the Vision" states, "And he makes them equal in power, and in might, and in dominion." The alcoholic, or addict, who was once "less than the dust of the earth" (Mosiah 4:2) is promised he or she can become equal to Jesus Christ as a result of His Atonement.
There is a play on words with the name "Benjamin" in the Book of Mormon. King Benjamin said, "And it shall come to pass that whosoever doeth this shall be found at the right hand of God, for he shall know the name by which he is called; for he shall be called by the name of Christ" (Mosiah 5:9). Those who enter into and honor covenants will be "on the right hand of God" to inherit all that He has.
The two things we seek after in Step Eleven, power and knowledge are manifest in the ordinances of the Melchizedek Priesthood:
"And this greater priesthood administereth the gospel and holdeth the key of the mysteries of the kingdom, even the key of the knowledge of God.
"Therefore, in the ordinances thereof, the power of godliness is manifest" (D&C 84:19-20).
"This Day" Is A Leitwort For A Covenant Making Day
It is significant that King Benjamin's speech uses the phrase "this day" five times.
"My brethren, all ye that have assembled yourselves together, you that can hear my words which I shall speak unto you this day . . . "
"and of all these things which I have spoken, ye yourselves are witnesses this day."
" I tell you these things that ye may know that I can answer a clear conscience before God this day."
"I should declare unto you this day, that my son Mosiah is a king and a ruler over you."
"And now, because of the covenant which ye have made ye shall be called the children of Christ, his sons, and his daughters; for behold, this day he hath spiritually begotten you" (Mosiah 2:9,14,15,30; 5:7).
In the Old Testament, the phrase "this day" is associated with a covenant-making day. Here are two examples:
"Choose you this day whom ye will serve"
"So Joshua made a covenant with the people that day" (Joshua 24:15,25).
"What can I do this day unto these my daughters, or unto their children which they have born?
"Now therefore come thou, let us make a covenant, I and thou; and let it be for a witness between me and thee."
"This heap is a witness between me and thee this day" (Genesis 31:43-44,48).
Notice how witnesses are employed in all these examples.
Because of the covenant they become spiritually begotten sons and daughters of Christ.
The Name of Christ
As a major component of the covenant, the people take upon themselves the name of Christ. This is always associated with temple covenants. The dedicatory prayer of the Kirtland Temple was given to the Prophet Joseph Smith through direct revelation according to his written statement. In the dedicatory prayer was this plea:
"And we ask thee, Holy Father, that thy servants may go forth from this house armed with thy power, and that thy name may be upon them, and thy glory be round about them, and thine angels have charge over them" (D&C 109:22).
That's certainly a lot of power! In the Aaronic Priesthood ordinances of baptism and the sacrament, we become "willing" to take upon ourselves the name of Jesus Christ (see D&C 20:77). This willingness step, like the Twelve Steps, is preparatory for temple ordinances where we actually take His name upon us, or have His name placed upon us, as the above verse suggests.
For the recovering addict (and actually for all of us) the path becomes clear as to where the Lord would like to lead us with the Twelve Steps.
Regarding the Feast of Tabernacles the Lord said, "Ye shall dwell in booths seven days; all that are Israelites born shall dwell in booths: That your generations may know that I made the children of Israel to dwell in booths, when I brought them out of the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God" (Leviticus 23:42-43).
Egypt was the "house of bondage" for the Israelites (see Exodus 20:2). Addiction is our house of bondage. If the Lord set up this feast as a symbol of recovery from addiction, then the events surrounding it, and particularly with King Benjamin's speech, are of paramount importance.
In Step Eleven we are seeking knowledge of God's will for us and to have the power to carry it out. Step Twelve speaks of a "spiritual awakening." The bridge between the Twelve Steps and a fullness of God's glory is the covenant path.
The name Benjamin means "son of the right hand." In what became known as "the Vision," Joseph Smith and Sidney Rigdon see Jesus Christ on the right hand of God the Father:
"For we saw him, even on the right hand of God; and we heard the voice bearing record that he is the Only Begotten of the Father—
"That by him, and through him, and of him, the worlds are and were created, and the inhabitants thereof are begotten sons and daughters unto God" (D&C 76:23-24).
King Benjamin becomes a type of Christ, who is the King of kings (Revelation 19:16). Later in "the Vision" it speaks of those who attain exaltation and godhood by saying, "They are they who are priests and kings (and priestesses and queens), who have received of his fulness, and of his glory . . . Wherefore, as it is written, they are gods, even the sons (and daughters) of God" (D&C 76:56,58).
Becoming a son or a daughter of God means to become a god in this context. To become a spiritually begotten son or daughter of Christ means to inherit what He has and become like He is. Verse 95 in "the Vision" states, "And he makes them equal in power, and in might, and in dominion." The alcoholic, or addict, who was once "less than the dust of the earth" (Mosiah 4:2) is promised he or she can become equal to Jesus Christ as a result of His Atonement.
There is a play on words with the name "Benjamin" in the Book of Mormon. King Benjamin said, "And it shall come to pass that whosoever doeth this shall be found at the right hand of God, for he shall know the name by which he is called; for he shall be called by the name of Christ" (Mosiah 5:9). Those who enter into and honor covenants will be "on the right hand of God" to inherit all that He has.
The two things we seek after in Step Eleven, power and knowledge are manifest in the ordinances of the Melchizedek Priesthood:
"And this greater priesthood administereth the gospel and holdeth the key of the mysteries of the kingdom, even the key of the knowledge of God.
"Therefore, in the ordinances thereof, the power of godliness is manifest" (D&C 84:19-20).
"This Day" Is A Leitwort For A Covenant Making Day
It is significant that King Benjamin's speech uses the phrase "this day" five times.
"My brethren, all ye that have assembled yourselves together, you that can hear my words which I shall speak unto you this day . . . "
"and of all these things which I have spoken, ye yourselves are witnesses this day."
" I tell you these things that ye may know that I can answer a clear conscience before God this day."
"I should declare unto you this day, that my son Mosiah is a king and a ruler over you."
"And now, because of the covenant which ye have made ye shall be called the children of Christ, his sons, and his daughters; for behold, this day he hath spiritually begotten you" (Mosiah 2:9,14,15,30; 5:7).
In the Old Testament, the phrase "this day" is associated with a covenant-making day. Here are two examples:
"Choose you this day whom ye will serve"
"So Joshua made a covenant with the people that day" (Joshua 24:15,25).
"What can I do this day unto these my daughters, or unto their children which they have born?
"Now therefore come thou, let us make a covenant, I and thou; and let it be for a witness between me and thee."
"This heap is a witness between me and thee this day" (Genesis 31:43-44,48).
Notice how witnesses are employed in all these examples.
Because of the covenant they become spiritually begotten sons and daughters of Christ.
The Name of Christ
As a major component of the covenant, the people take upon themselves the name of Christ. This is always associated with temple covenants. The dedicatory prayer of the Kirtland Temple was given to the Prophet Joseph Smith through direct revelation according to his written statement. In the dedicatory prayer was this plea:
"And we ask thee, Holy Father, that thy servants may go forth from this house armed with thy power, and that thy name may be upon them, and thy glory be round about them, and thine angels have charge over them" (D&C 109:22).
That's certainly a lot of power! In the Aaronic Priesthood ordinances of baptism and the sacrament, we become "willing" to take upon ourselves the name of Jesus Christ (see D&C 20:77). This willingness step, like the Twelve Steps, is preparatory for temple ordinances where we actually take His name upon us, or have His name placed upon us, as the above verse suggests.
For the recovering addict (and actually for all of us) the path becomes clear as to where the Lord would like to lead us with the Twelve Steps.
Sunday, June 4, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step Twelve
King Benjamin completes the Twelve Steps of recovery in Mosiah chapter 4. Those of us who have been blessed with recovery and God's grace feel a sense of need to carry the message to the still-suffering addict.
AA Step Twelve: "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Twelve: "Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, share this message with others and practice these principles in all you do."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Twelve Key Principle: Service
King Benjamin: "For behold, if the knowledge of the goodness of God at this time has awakened you to a sense of your nothingness, and your worthless and fallen state—
"I say unto you, if ye have come to a knowledge of the goodness of God, and his matchless power, and his wisdom, and his patience, and his long-suffering towards the children of men; and also, the atonement which has been prepared from the foundation of the world, that thereby salvation might come to him that should put his trust in the Lord, and should be diligent in keeping his commandments, and continue in the faith even unto the end of his life, I mean the life of the mortal body—
"And also, ye yourselves will succor those that stand in need of your succor; ye will administer of your substance unto him that standeth in need; and ye will not suffer that the beggar putteth up his petition to you in vain, and turn him out to perish" (Mosiah 4:5-6,16).
It's significant that the original AA version for this step, the LDS version, and King Benjamin's discourse, all speak of a "spiritual awakening." It's also worth noting that the words "alcohol" or "alcoholic" only appear in the first and last step. Upon reading these Twelve Steps for the first time, I quickly discounted their value, thinking the recurrence of the mention of God, or a Higher Power, and the lack of recurrence of mentioning alcohol, did not address my drinking problem. I reasoned to myself how I could go to church, but then be drunk two hours later. But by reading the AA Big Book, attending AA meetings, and listening to others who had serious time invested in the program, I eventually learned I didn't really have a "drinking" problem--I had a "living" problem. I was not willing to "live life on life's terms" according to the AA principle, and even more importantly, I was not willing to "live life on God's terms," as discussed in the LDS program.
Really, we alcoholics and addicts have a spiritual disease, and it requires a spiritual cure. The AA Big Book teaches that without a spiritual experience (or an awakening unto God), we are likely to drink and use again.
King Benjamin links the first and last step--the steps that specifically mention alcohol or a drug of choice--by contrasting our powerlessness as described in Step One with the "goodness of God" and our newfound spirituality as discussed in Step Twelve. I have to admit my own bias with these steps. For some of them, I prefer the original AA wording; and for others I prefer the LDS Recovery Guide wording. For this step, I really appreciate the wording in the LDS Guide as echoed by King Benjamin. (Actually, it should be the other way around, since King Benjamin gave his Twelve Step discourse long before Alcoholics Anonymous was ever heard of.)
Today I have a personal testimony of the truths taught by King Benjamin. I know it wasn't really the Steps that brought sobriety, recovery, and God's goodness into my life. Instead, my recovery is a result of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. And I have also recently learned and gained a testimony that, just as President Russell M. Nelson taught us in the most recent General Conference, that "It is the Savior who delivers us from physical and spiritual death." He holds the key to my sobriety and recovery. The Steps are steps to Christ. He is the One who heals me and empowers me to stay clean and sober one day at a time.
At my first AA meeting, way back on July 17, 1989, I stood in awe and disbelief. At the end of the meeting I must have had fifteen or so people come up to me and say how glad they were that I was there. They gave me their phone numbers and meeting schedules. The next day I attended the Lunch Bunch Meeting for the first time and met the man who would become my sponsor for fourteen years. He said to me, "You don't know how glad I am to see you here." About two months later, I attended a meeting in Williamsburg, Virginia and a few days later, one in Washington DC. At both meetings I got hugs, help, and phone numbers. I had to wonder why they would even care about a total stranger like me.
One day I heard someone share about his recovery. He said, "You have to give it away to keep it." I had learned what Bill W. and Dr. Bob had learned in 1935. Bill had gone to Akron, Ohio on a business trip and was tempted to drink. He phoned various clergymen trying to find another alcoholic to talk to. Bill knew this was the only way he could stay sober. He found another drunk in Dr. Bob, a surgeon. Bob finally agreed to give Bill 15 minutes of his time, but the conversation lasted six hours. AA was founded on Dr. Bob's sobriety date--June 10, 1935. Alcoholics Anonymous will celebrate its 82nd birthday on Saturday.
King Benjamin was right. We "will succor those that stand in need of (our) succor," because we are all "beggars" before God (see Mosiah 4:16,19). Sobriety, recovery, and God's grace are gifts from Him.
We will not turn away the beggar, and neither will God.
AA Step Twelve: "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Twelve: "Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, share this message with others and practice these principles in all you do."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Twelve Key Principle: Service
King Benjamin: "For behold, if the knowledge of the goodness of God at this time has awakened you to a sense of your nothingness, and your worthless and fallen state—
"I say unto you, if ye have come to a knowledge of the goodness of God, and his matchless power, and his wisdom, and his patience, and his long-suffering towards the children of men; and also, the atonement which has been prepared from the foundation of the world, that thereby salvation might come to him that should put his trust in the Lord, and should be diligent in keeping his commandments, and continue in the faith even unto the end of his life, I mean the life of the mortal body—
"And also, ye yourselves will succor those that stand in need of your succor; ye will administer of your substance unto him that standeth in need; and ye will not suffer that the beggar putteth up his petition to you in vain, and turn him out to perish" (Mosiah 4:5-6,16).
It's significant that the original AA version for this step, the LDS version, and King Benjamin's discourse, all speak of a "spiritual awakening." It's also worth noting that the words "alcohol" or "alcoholic" only appear in the first and last step. Upon reading these Twelve Steps for the first time, I quickly discounted their value, thinking the recurrence of the mention of God, or a Higher Power, and the lack of recurrence of mentioning alcohol, did not address my drinking problem. I reasoned to myself how I could go to church, but then be drunk two hours later. But by reading the AA Big Book, attending AA meetings, and listening to others who had serious time invested in the program, I eventually learned I didn't really have a "drinking" problem--I had a "living" problem. I was not willing to "live life on life's terms" according to the AA principle, and even more importantly, I was not willing to "live life on God's terms," as discussed in the LDS program.
Really, we alcoholics and addicts have a spiritual disease, and it requires a spiritual cure. The AA Big Book teaches that without a spiritual experience (or an awakening unto God), we are likely to drink and use again.
King Benjamin links the first and last step--the steps that specifically mention alcohol or a drug of choice--by contrasting our powerlessness as described in Step One with the "goodness of God" and our newfound spirituality as discussed in Step Twelve. I have to admit my own bias with these steps. For some of them, I prefer the original AA wording; and for others I prefer the LDS Recovery Guide wording. For this step, I really appreciate the wording in the LDS Guide as echoed by King Benjamin. (Actually, it should be the other way around, since King Benjamin gave his Twelve Step discourse long before Alcoholics Anonymous was ever heard of.)
Today I have a personal testimony of the truths taught by King Benjamin. I know it wasn't really the Steps that brought sobriety, recovery, and God's goodness into my life. Instead, my recovery is a result of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. And I have also recently learned and gained a testimony that, just as President Russell M. Nelson taught us in the most recent General Conference, that "It is the Savior who delivers us from physical and spiritual death." He holds the key to my sobriety and recovery. The Steps are steps to Christ. He is the One who heals me and empowers me to stay clean and sober one day at a time.
At my first AA meeting, way back on July 17, 1989, I stood in awe and disbelief. At the end of the meeting I must have had fifteen or so people come up to me and say how glad they were that I was there. They gave me their phone numbers and meeting schedules. The next day I attended the Lunch Bunch Meeting for the first time and met the man who would become my sponsor for fourteen years. He said to me, "You don't know how glad I am to see you here." About two months later, I attended a meeting in Williamsburg, Virginia and a few days later, one in Washington DC. At both meetings I got hugs, help, and phone numbers. I had to wonder why they would even care about a total stranger like me.
One day I heard someone share about his recovery. He said, "You have to give it away to keep it." I had learned what Bill W. and Dr. Bob had learned in 1935. Bill had gone to Akron, Ohio on a business trip and was tempted to drink. He phoned various clergymen trying to find another alcoholic to talk to. Bill knew this was the only way he could stay sober. He found another drunk in Dr. Bob, a surgeon. Bob finally agreed to give Bill 15 minutes of his time, but the conversation lasted six hours. AA was founded on Dr. Bob's sobriety date--June 10, 1935. Alcoholics Anonymous will celebrate its 82nd birthday on Saturday.
King Benjamin was right. We "will succor those that stand in need of (our) succor," because we are all "beggars" before God (see Mosiah 4:16,19). Sobriety, recovery, and God's grace are gifts from Him.
We will not turn away the beggar, and neither will God.
Sunday, May 28, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step Eleven
Now I come to my favorite step--Step Eleven. This is such a wonderful step. I hope I can do it justice. I dare say, having a conscious contact with God has been the greatest blessing of recovery for me. In speaking of a conscious contact with Deity, I include God's grace and my ever-increasing awareness of how He is in the details of our lives. I dare make such a bold statement because the principles behind Step Eleven are the source of the greatest blessings I have experienced in recovery.
AA Step Eleven: "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out."
LDS Guide to Addiction Recovery Step Eleven: "Seek through prayer and meditation to know the Lord’s will and to have the power to carry it out."
LDS Guide to Addiction Recovery Key Principle for Step Eleven: Personal Revelation
King Benjamin Elaborates Step Eleven
Because this step gets expanded a bit in King Benjamin's speech, I'm taking a slightly different approach for this step. Like all Twelve Steps, this one is fully explained and expanded in Mosiah chapter 4. I want to look at each component of the step using the AA version as the pattern.
"Seek through prayer . . ." King Benjamin said, "Humble yourselves even in the depths of humility, calling on the name of the Lord daily" (Mosiah 4:11). This is a step we need to work on a daily basis making personal prayer an integral part of recovery.
"Improve our conscious contact with God" "And behold, I say unto you that if ye do this ye shall always rejoice, and be filled with the love of God, and always retain a remission of your sins; and ye shall grow in the knowledge of the glory of him that created you, or in the knowledge of that which is just and true" (Mosiah 4:12).
Our knowledge of God's glory and grace, and our entire relationship with Him will improve (or grow) as this step suggests. Our "conscious contact" with God comes through the Holy Ghost, and as the Apostle Paul explained, love, joy, and peace are fruits of the Spirit (see Galatians 5:22).
"As we understood Him" The LDS version of the step omits this phrase since we understand that our relationship is with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. AA uses the concept of a "Higher Power" out of respect for universal belief. However, I think there is a spiritual basis for this phrase. Our relationship with God is enhanced by our understanding of Him and His attributes. King Benjamin said, "I say unto you, if ye have come to a knowledge of the goodness of God, and his matchless power, and his wisdom, and his patience, and his long-suffering towards the children of men; and also, the atonement which has been prepared from the foundation of the world . . . (Mosiah 4:6). Benjamin lists the attributes of goodness, power, wisdom, patience, and long-suffering. These are important for us as addicts to understand. These are the attributes the Lord is eager to have us attain so we can become like Him.
When I first came into Twelve Step recovery, my concept of God had been severely damaged. I thought of a strict, vengeful God, ready to zap me for all my sins and transgressions. In the introduction to the LDS Guide it states, "We invite you with all our empathy and love to join us in a glorious life of freedom and safety, encircled in the arms of Jesus Christ, our Redeemer." It is comforting to know that because the Lord is good, wise, and patient, He is able and willing to help us through recovery, and that we can be "encircled" in His loving arms of safety.
"Praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out" President Gordon B. Hinckley has observed that many of us say our prayers like we're ordering groceries. We make a list of things we want and hang up. In true recovery we surrender our will and lives to God, according to Step Three. This leaves little room for self-interest. Instead we are seeking to know God's will for us and to have the power to carry it out. Thus, we are really only praying for two things--knowledge and power.
The scriptures contain many examples of this knowledge and power combination, but there are only a few places we can go to obtain this combination. In Mosiah 4 this combination is listed at least three times. Verse 6 begins, "If ye have come to a knowledge of the goodness of God, and his matchless power . . ." Verses 11 and 12 both have the phrase "knowledge of the glory of (God)."
This combination of knowledge and glory (or power) comes together in the vision of Moses, as he says, "But now mine own eyes have beheld God; but not my natural, but my spiritual eyes, for my natural eyes could not have beheld; for I should have withered and died in his presence; but his glory was upon me; and I beheld his face, for I was transfigured before him" (Moses 1:11). Moses was able to obtain knowledge otherwise not obtainable except that he is transfigured, or empowered before God to be able to stand in His presence. That's "conscious contact" perfected.
Joseph Smith went into a grove of trees seeking knowledge of which church to join (see Joseph Smith--History 1:10,12,18), but the Lord lets him know that the "power of godliness" is not to be found on the earth.
One of the things I appreciate about Alcoholics Anonymous is that it does not overstep its bounds. AA's singleness of purpose is to help the alcoholic who still suffers and to help its members achieve sobriety. AA does not promise to get you to heaven or to grant exaltation. Perfection of Step Eleven is beyond the scope of Alcoholics Anonymous and is vested in the ordinances of the Melchizedek Priesthood.
Look at these verses with the knowledge/power combination:
"And this greater priesthood administereth the gospel and holdeth the key of the mysteries of the kingdom, even the key of the knowledge of God.
"Therefore, in the ordinances thereof, the power of godliness is manifest.
"And without the ordinances thereof, and the authority of the priesthood, the power of godliness is not manifest unto men in the flesh;
"For without this no man can see the face of God, even the Father, and live" (Doctrine and Covenants 84:19-22).
In the House of the Lord I was given the personal revelation necessary to find my sweetheart. In the House of the Lord we were sealed together for time and all eternity. Through the ordinances of the House of the Lord, our children were born in the covenant allowing the Holy Spirit of Promise to seal or ratify those ordinances based on worthiness.
Yes, I can say Step Eleven has brought the best blessings into my life!
The temple takes "conscious contact with God" to a new level.
AA Step Eleven: "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out."
LDS Guide to Addiction Recovery Step Eleven: "Seek through prayer and meditation to know the Lord’s will and to have the power to carry it out."
LDS Guide to Addiction Recovery Key Principle for Step Eleven: Personal Revelation
King Benjamin Elaborates Step Eleven
Because this step gets expanded a bit in King Benjamin's speech, I'm taking a slightly different approach for this step. Like all Twelve Steps, this one is fully explained and expanded in Mosiah chapter 4. I want to look at each component of the step using the AA version as the pattern.
"Seek through prayer . . ." King Benjamin said, "Humble yourselves even in the depths of humility, calling on the name of the Lord daily" (Mosiah 4:11). This is a step we need to work on a daily basis making personal prayer an integral part of recovery.
"Improve our conscious contact with God" "And behold, I say unto you that if ye do this ye shall always rejoice, and be filled with the love of God, and always retain a remission of your sins; and ye shall grow in the knowledge of the glory of him that created you, or in the knowledge of that which is just and true" (Mosiah 4:12).
Our knowledge of God's glory and grace, and our entire relationship with Him will improve (or grow) as this step suggests. Our "conscious contact" with God comes through the Holy Ghost, and as the Apostle Paul explained, love, joy, and peace are fruits of the Spirit (see Galatians 5:22).
"As we understood Him" The LDS version of the step omits this phrase since we understand that our relationship is with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. AA uses the concept of a "Higher Power" out of respect for universal belief. However, I think there is a spiritual basis for this phrase. Our relationship with God is enhanced by our understanding of Him and His attributes. King Benjamin said, "I say unto you, if ye have come to a knowledge of the goodness of God, and his matchless power, and his wisdom, and his patience, and his long-suffering towards the children of men; and also, the atonement which has been prepared from the foundation of the world . . . (Mosiah 4:6). Benjamin lists the attributes of goodness, power, wisdom, patience, and long-suffering. These are important for us as addicts to understand. These are the attributes the Lord is eager to have us attain so we can become like Him.
When I first came into Twelve Step recovery, my concept of God had been severely damaged. I thought of a strict, vengeful God, ready to zap me for all my sins and transgressions. In the introduction to the LDS Guide it states, "We invite you with all our empathy and love to join us in a glorious life of freedom and safety, encircled in the arms of Jesus Christ, our Redeemer." It is comforting to know that because the Lord is good, wise, and patient, He is able and willing to help us through recovery, and that we can be "encircled" in His loving arms of safety.
"Praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out" President Gordon B. Hinckley has observed that many of us say our prayers like we're ordering groceries. We make a list of things we want and hang up. In true recovery we surrender our will and lives to God, according to Step Three. This leaves little room for self-interest. Instead we are seeking to know God's will for us and to have the power to carry it out. Thus, we are really only praying for two things--knowledge and power.
The scriptures contain many examples of this knowledge and power combination, but there are only a few places we can go to obtain this combination. In Mosiah 4 this combination is listed at least three times. Verse 6 begins, "If ye have come to a knowledge of the goodness of God, and his matchless power . . ." Verses 11 and 12 both have the phrase "knowledge of the glory of (God)."
This combination of knowledge and glory (or power) comes together in the vision of Moses, as he says, "But now mine own eyes have beheld God; but not my natural, but my spiritual eyes, for my natural eyes could not have beheld; for I should have withered and died in his presence; but his glory was upon me; and I beheld his face, for I was transfigured before him" (Moses 1:11). Moses was able to obtain knowledge otherwise not obtainable except that he is transfigured, or empowered before God to be able to stand in His presence. That's "conscious contact" perfected.
Joseph Smith went into a grove of trees seeking knowledge of which church to join (see Joseph Smith--History 1:10,12,18), but the Lord lets him know that the "power of godliness" is not to be found on the earth.
One of the things I appreciate about Alcoholics Anonymous is that it does not overstep its bounds. AA's singleness of purpose is to help the alcoholic who still suffers and to help its members achieve sobriety. AA does not promise to get you to heaven or to grant exaltation. Perfection of Step Eleven is beyond the scope of Alcoholics Anonymous and is vested in the ordinances of the Melchizedek Priesthood.
Look at these verses with the knowledge/power combination:
"And this greater priesthood administereth the gospel and holdeth the key of the mysteries of the kingdom, even the key of the knowledge of God.
"Therefore, in the ordinances thereof, the power of godliness is manifest.
"And without the ordinances thereof, and the authority of the priesthood, the power of godliness is not manifest unto men in the flesh;
"For without this no man can see the face of God, even the Father, and live" (Doctrine and Covenants 84:19-22).
In the House of the Lord I was given the personal revelation necessary to find my sweetheart. In the House of the Lord we were sealed together for time and all eternity. Through the ordinances of the House of the Lord, our children were born in the covenant allowing the Holy Spirit of Promise to seal or ratify those ordinances based on worthiness.
Yes, I can say Step Eleven has brought the best blessings into my life!
The temple takes "conscious contact with God" to a new level.
Sunday, May 21, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step Ten
Sometimes Steps Ten through Twelve are called "maintenance steps." Steps One through Nine are similar to repentance steps, and now we are trying to maintain sobriety. I would rather think of Steps Ten through Twelve as growth steps.
AA Step Ten: "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Ten: "Continue to take personal inventory, and when you are wrong promptly admit it."
LDS Addiction Recovery Key Principle for Step Ten: Daily Accountability
King Benjamin: "But this much I can tell you, that if ye do not watch yourselves, and your thoughts, and your words, and your deeds, and observe the commandments of God, and continue in the faith of what ye have heard concerning the coming of our Lord, even unto the end of your lives, ye must perish. And now, O man, remember, and perish not" (Mosiah 4:30).
For me, one of the main reasons for the success of Alcoholics Anonymous is the principle of once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic. The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous states, "We are like men who have lost their legs; they never grow new ones" (Alcoholics Anonymous, Chapter 3). In a later chapter it states, "It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities" (Alcoholics Anonymous, Chapter 6).
Daily accountability keeps us on track. We can make smaller course corrections before it's too late--before our newfound sobriety is in jeopardy. King Benjamin's wording is consistent with the Step. We must "continue" taking inventory of ourselves and "continue in the faith." King Benjamin gives us three areas to watch--our thoughts, words, and deeds. Many addicts in recovery will do a sort of mini inventory at night before retiring for the day. It's a good time to reflect on the things that went well, to express gratitude for the many blessings God has given us, and to look for improvement. The sacrament is another opportunity to take inventory and contemplate areas that could use correction.
As I have expressed with many of these steps, my early days found me thinking I would only have to work each step once and be done and graduate from the program. Twenty-seven years later, I'm still trying to work the steps. I will share one personal experience.
One cold January morning I went outside to our garage. I can't remember what for; probably to get the snow shovel. Sitting in the garage next to our car was what my sweetheart would term a fine piece of antique furniture. I believe it was supposed to be a desk. I did not share the same opinion. I thought to myself, that has to be the ugliest piece of furniture I have ever seen. I wondered what it was doing in our garage and why I didn't know about this. I marched into the house and asked what this blankety blank thing was, and was informed that she received this from her sister and it was going upstairs in one of the bedrooms.
I just got madder as I thought about this. How dare she bring something like this into our house? And especially without asking me. I should have heeded the Big Book which says resentments are like poison to the alcoholic. But I didn't. Instead I went into insanity mode and my mind raced and jumped to conclusions. As I looked at this piece of antiquity, I wondered if I would be able to get my lawnmower out of the garage since it appeared to be blocking the way. Despite the freezing temperature, and snow on the ground, and despite the fact that it would be at least three months before I would need to use the lawnmower, I decided to attempt the feat of moving the mower. Just as my brilliant observation supposed, the mower got stuck and it was probably one inch shy of clearance.
Now I was really frustrated. I was wearing some winter boots and so I went over and gently tried to push the desk with my foot to slide it over just a bit. It wouldn't budge. Now this is where it gets into a point of disagreement with my wife (who wasn't there). She says I kicked the desk. I say I just pushed it more firmly with my foot. Whatever the case, I then noticed a small crack in one of the drawers where I tried to push it with my foot. Okay, I kicked it.
Knowing I was in trouble now, I walked back into the house and informed my dear wife that as I gently tried to move her fine piece of furniture, I accidentally cracked one of the drawers. Her immediate response was, "You need an AA meeting." I humbly followed her advice and provided entertainment at the Lunch Bunch Meeting for all my addict friends.
But at least I didn't have to get drunk over it!
By the way, this "beautiful desk" is still in the bedroom. She won. But I get to stay married and sober.
AA Step Ten: "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Ten: "Continue to take personal inventory, and when you are wrong promptly admit it."
LDS Addiction Recovery Key Principle for Step Ten: Daily Accountability
King Benjamin: "But this much I can tell you, that if ye do not watch yourselves, and your thoughts, and your words, and your deeds, and observe the commandments of God, and continue in the faith of what ye have heard concerning the coming of our Lord, even unto the end of your lives, ye must perish. And now, O man, remember, and perish not" (Mosiah 4:30).
For me, one of the main reasons for the success of Alcoholics Anonymous is the principle of once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic. The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous states, "We are like men who have lost their legs; they never grow new ones" (Alcoholics Anonymous, Chapter 3). In a later chapter it states, "It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities" (Alcoholics Anonymous, Chapter 6).
Daily accountability keeps us on track. We can make smaller course corrections before it's too late--before our newfound sobriety is in jeopardy. King Benjamin's wording is consistent with the Step. We must "continue" taking inventory of ourselves and "continue in the faith." King Benjamin gives us three areas to watch--our thoughts, words, and deeds. Many addicts in recovery will do a sort of mini inventory at night before retiring for the day. It's a good time to reflect on the things that went well, to express gratitude for the many blessings God has given us, and to look for improvement. The sacrament is another opportunity to take inventory and contemplate areas that could use correction.
As I have expressed with many of these steps, my early days found me thinking I would only have to work each step once and be done and graduate from the program. Twenty-seven years later, I'm still trying to work the steps. I will share one personal experience.
One cold January morning I went outside to our garage. I can't remember what for; probably to get the snow shovel. Sitting in the garage next to our car was what my sweetheart would term a fine piece of antique furniture. I believe it was supposed to be a desk. I did not share the same opinion. I thought to myself, that has to be the ugliest piece of furniture I have ever seen. I wondered what it was doing in our garage and why I didn't know about this. I marched into the house and asked what this blankety blank thing was, and was informed that she received this from her sister and it was going upstairs in one of the bedrooms.
I just got madder as I thought about this. How dare she bring something like this into our house? And especially without asking me. I should have heeded the Big Book which says resentments are like poison to the alcoholic. But I didn't. Instead I went into insanity mode and my mind raced and jumped to conclusions. As I looked at this piece of antiquity, I wondered if I would be able to get my lawnmower out of the garage since it appeared to be blocking the way. Despite the freezing temperature, and snow on the ground, and despite the fact that it would be at least three months before I would need to use the lawnmower, I decided to attempt the feat of moving the mower. Just as my brilliant observation supposed, the mower got stuck and it was probably one inch shy of clearance.
Now I was really frustrated. I was wearing some winter boots and so I went over and gently tried to push the desk with my foot to slide it over just a bit. It wouldn't budge. Now this is where it gets into a point of disagreement with my wife (who wasn't there). She says I kicked the desk. I say I just pushed it more firmly with my foot. Whatever the case, I then noticed a small crack in one of the drawers where I tried to push it with my foot. Okay, I kicked it.
Knowing I was in trouble now, I walked back into the house and informed my dear wife that as I gently tried to move her fine piece of furniture, I accidentally cracked one of the drawers. Her immediate response was, "You need an AA meeting." I humbly followed her advice and provided entertainment at the Lunch Bunch Meeting for all my addict friends.
But at least I didn't have to get drunk over it!
By the way, this "beautiful desk" is still in the bedroom. She won. But I get to stay married and sober.
Sunday, May 14, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step Nine
In Step Eight we became willing to make amends to all persons we had harmed. Now again in Step Nine the rubber meets the road as we begin to make restitution and offer sincere apologies for the wreckage of the past.
AA Step Nine: "Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Nine: "Wherever possible, make direct restitution to all persons you have harmed."
LDS Step Nine Key Principle: Restitution and Reconciliation
King Benjamin: "And ye will not have a mind to injure one another, but to live peaceably, and to render to every man according to that which is his due" (Mosiah 4:13).
The first part of this verse in Mosiah is about Step Eight. Because we do not want to harm others, and realizing our actions in the past caused great harm, we become willing to make amends. The last part of this verse is about the actual process of making restitution where possible. Since the first part of the verse is about avoiding injury to others, of necessity, the last part about rendering to every man (or woman) according to that which is his due, must deal with settling the score. We need to offer apologies, make restitution, and become reconciled if it's due. If we owe someone an apology, we render according to his or her due.
Not much later in the Book of Mormon we see an actual Step Nine in action as Alma the younger and the sons of Mosiah went about "zealously striving to repair all the injuries which they had done to the church" (Mosiah 27:35).
In my early recovery I considered Step Nine to be the most challenging for me. It was especially hard to make apologies to those closest to me, like my parents. There were many broken promises and insincere apologies from the past, and these haunted me. I kept waiting until I had enough sobriety to back up my apologies. But as time went on, it just became harder.
I mentioned adding BYU to my list to make amends. I had had conversations on the bus with a man who became a good friend. After I discovered he worked in the Honor Code Office the Spirit kept nagging me to go work a Step Nine with the university.
One morning on the bus I asked if I could meet with him. He invited me to meet with him in his office. I confessed that while I was a student there I had violated the Honor Code almost daily with my drinking. Part of the Honor Code was an agreement to abide by the Word of Wisdom. Of course my friend was a professional counselor. He said, "Do you feel like you need to make restitution?" Without thinking, the words popped out of my mouth, "I do." I immediately wondered what I had gotten myself into. I thought he might give me a service project on campus, like picking up litter or something. Instead he said if I would stay active in Twelve Step recovery and try to carry the message and help other addicts, that on behalf of the university he was authorized to wipe the slate clean. I would be forgiven by the university.
Later he actually referred students to me who were grasped by the clutches of addiction and alcoholism. When I was a student there, I thought I was the only alcoholic on campus. By attempting to work Step Nine I was also working Step Twelve as I tried to carry the message to others.
Thus, it was like killing two birds with one stone.
Steps Five and Nine are very difficult. It's not easy to confess and it's not easy to make amends. But the reward is a burden of guilt lifted off one's shoulders. I testify it is very liberating. It heals and cleanses the soul. I also testify of the Lord's grace in working all these steps. Doors are opened and opportunities are presented allowing us to do what we are not able by ourselves.
Sunday, May 7, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step Eight
While several of the preceding steps deal with our relationship with God, Steps Eight and Nine deal with our interactions with others. Again there is the willingness step ahead of the action step. The willingness is expressed as part of the step.
AA Step Eight: "Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Eight: "Make a written list of all persons you have harmed and become willing to make restitution to them."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Eight Principle: Seeking Forgiveness
King Benjamin: "And ye will not have a mind to injure one another, but to live peaceably, and to render to every man according to that which is his due" (Mosiah 4:13).
The effect of the steps is a changed heart. I want to emphasize that this happens for most of us very gradually over time. After King Benjamin has taught his people in depth concerning the Atonement of Jesus Christ, the plan of salvation, and quite arguably the Twelve Steps, we immediately see the result in the next chapter. The verse states, "And they all cried with one voice, saying: Yea, we believe all the words which thou hast spoken unto us; and also, we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually" (Mosiah 5:2). The people also gained an appreciation for "the infinite goodness of God" and had "great views" of the future (see Mosiah 5:3). In AA we would say the people had a new pair of glasses.
Because of this change of heart we lose the desire to cause any harm to another of God's Creation. This is in stark contrast to the selfishness that fueled addiction and the concern we had for only ourselves. In our practicing years of addiction we caused extreme damage and much "wreckage." The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous points out that the newcomer is the lifeblood of the program. We welcome newcomers and can always relate because their stories haven't changed over the years. They sound just like we did when we came into the program. I have been attending Twelve Step meetings for 27 years now and have never heard one addict come into the program and say, "I'm just living the dream. I always wanted to become an alcoholic. Couldn't be better." No, they relate stories of broken marriages, broken homes, broken relationships, lost jobs, jail, etc. etc. This is good for us old-timers to hear, because if I'm ever tempted to go back out and give it one more try, I am reminded that it still isn't any better out there. There's an old AA adage that says, "Alcoholics don't have relationships, they just take hostages." How true!
Now in Steps Eight and Nine we get to attempt to seek forgiveness and clean up our "wreckage of the past." As King Benjamin taught, we will not have a "mind to injure" and so we begin to make a list of those we have harmed and make peace with those we injured in the past.
As we do this we become overwhelmed at the thought of making restitution, which in many cases is not even possible. How will I find all these people? What if they reject my attempt to be reconciled? And how can I fix the damage already done? The answer to all these questions is the Atonement of Jesus Christ. We really can't heal, and often we really can't restore something we have taken away (like someone's virtue). But the Savior can.
These steps are ongoing. Maybe they're eternal. My list has grown over the years, so it's likely to have additions in the future. And I was, and am still, so naive about working these steps. I thought once I made the list and made amends I would be done, but sadly this is not the case since I continue to injure others in sobriety, sometimes unintentionally. Like King Benjamin teaches, it's the attitude that's important. We won't "have a mind to injure" others even though injuries happen.
I will give one personal example. Many years into recovery I rode the bus with many of the students and faculty of BYU. They would always get off the bus on campus. Many of the people I talked to were BYU professors. One day I asked a particular man what he did on campus, expecting him to be a professor of something. He informed me that he worked in the Honor Code office. I remembered that BYU had an honor code involving dress and grooming standards and standards of behavior regarding moral conduct and the Word of Wisdom. As I thought about this, I realized I had violated the Honor Code almost every day as a student, due to my drinking.
The Spirit just kept eating away at me and reminding me every time I saw him how I had basically lied to the university and broken my promise. They were still good enough to give me a diploma. These steps are not always easy. I finally added the institution of Brigham Young University to my Step Eight list.
I will tell you the outcome of this experience next week in Step Nine. Some of my Twelve Step buddies know how much I love Step Nine (ha ha--NOT).
AA Step Eight: "Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Eight: "Make a written list of all persons you have harmed and become willing to make restitution to them."
LDS Addiction Recovery Step Eight Principle: Seeking Forgiveness
King Benjamin: "And ye will not have a mind to injure one another, but to live peaceably, and to render to every man according to that which is his due" (Mosiah 4:13).
The effect of the steps is a changed heart. I want to emphasize that this happens for most of us very gradually over time. After King Benjamin has taught his people in depth concerning the Atonement of Jesus Christ, the plan of salvation, and quite arguably the Twelve Steps, we immediately see the result in the next chapter. The verse states, "And they all cried with one voice, saying: Yea, we believe all the words which thou hast spoken unto us; and also, we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually" (Mosiah 5:2). The people also gained an appreciation for "the infinite goodness of God" and had "great views" of the future (see Mosiah 5:3). In AA we would say the people had a new pair of glasses.
Because of this change of heart we lose the desire to cause any harm to another of God's Creation. This is in stark contrast to the selfishness that fueled addiction and the concern we had for only ourselves. In our practicing years of addiction we caused extreme damage and much "wreckage." The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous points out that the newcomer is the lifeblood of the program. We welcome newcomers and can always relate because their stories haven't changed over the years. They sound just like we did when we came into the program. I have been attending Twelve Step meetings for 27 years now and have never heard one addict come into the program and say, "I'm just living the dream. I always wanted to become an alcoholic. Couldn't be better." No, they relate stories of broken marriages, broken homes, broken relationships, lost jobs, jail, etc. etc. This is good for us old-timers to hear, because if I'm ever tempted to go back out and give it one more try, I am reminded that it still isn't any better out there. There's an old AA adage that says, "Alcoholics don't have relationships, they just take hostages." How true!
Now in Steps Eight and Nine we get to attempt to seek forgiveness and clean up our "wreckage of the past." As King Benjamin taught, we will not have a "mind to injure" and so we begin to make a list of those we have harmed and make peace with those we injured in the past.
As we do this we become overwhelmed at the thought of making restitution, which in many cases is not even possible. How will I find all these people? What if they reject my attempt to be reconciled? And how can I fix the damage already done? The answer to all these questions is the Atonement of Jesus Christ. We really can't heal, and often we really can't restore something we have taken away (like someone's virtue). But the Savior can.
These steps are ongoing. Maybe they're eternal. My list has grown over the years, so it's likely to have additions in the future. And I was, and am still, so naive about working these steps. I thought once I made the list and made amends I would be done, but sadly this is not the case since I continue to injure others in sobriety, sometimes unintentionally. Like King Benjamin teaches, it's the attitude that's important. We won't "have a mind to injure" others even though injuries happen.
I will give one personal example. Many years into recovery I rode the bus with many of the students and faculty of BYU. They would always get off the bus on campus. Many of the people I talked to were BYU professors. One day I asked a particular man what he did on campus, expecting him to be a professor of something. He informed me that he worked in the Honor Code office. I remembered that BYU had an honor code involving dress and grooming standards and standards of behavior regarding moral conduct and the Word of Wisdom. As I thought about this, I realized I had violated the Honor Code almost every day as a student, due to my drinking.
The Spirit just kept eating away at me and reminding me every time I saw him how I had basically lied to the university and broken my promise. They were still good enough to give me a diploma. These steps are not always easy. I finally added the institution of Brigham Young University to my Step Eight list.
I will tell you the outcome of this experience next week in Step Nine. Some of my Twelve Step buddies know how much I love Step Nine (ha ha--NOT).
Sunday, April 30, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step Seven
Step Six was the willingness step. Now it's the action step of seven. But just like none of us ever got sober by ourselves, this is another step in trusting God.
AA Step Seven: "Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings."
LDS Addiction Recovery Guide: "Humbly ask Heavenly Father to remove your shortcomings."
King Benjamin: "And again, believe that ye must repent of your sins and forsake them, and humble yourselves before God; and ask in sincerity of heart that he would forgive you; and now, if you believe all these things see that ye do them." (Mosiah 4:10).
The phrase, "humble yourselves before God; and ask," could not be any closer to the AA Step without infringing on copyright laws. However, we must remember that any lawsuits levied here would come upon Alcoholics Anonymous and not the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. The Book of Mormon was published just over 100 years earlier than the founding of Alcoholics Anonymous, which, like the Book of Mormon, needed additional witnesses to verify its truthfulness. The Book of Mormon needed its three and eight witnesses to testify, and AA was founded on the sobriety date of its second member, Dr. Bob Smith on June 10, 1935. Thus, there had to be at least two to testify. And of course, this speech was actually delivered by King Benjamin over 2,100 years ago.
Since this step aligns so perfectly with King Benjamin's teachings and Restoration scripture, perhaps this would be a good time to mention just a couple of similarities between AA and the restored Church of Jesus Christ.
I feel blessed to belong to two of perhaps just a handful of organizations that believe in personal revelation and divine personal guidance directly from God. I will need to cover this in greater detail in Step Eleven, which speaks of a "conscious contact with God." In a gospel setting, we call this personal revelation.
The New York-Ohio Connection
In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous and in other places, AA founder Bill W. refers to his personal "Higher Power" as "the Father of Lights." He was admitted into Towns Hospital in New York City, where he had a profound spiritual experience that would change his life and the lives of countless drunks like me. Francis Hartigan observed, "While under treatment at Towns Hospital, Bill Wilson experiences a flash of white light and an overwhelming sense of well-being that frees him from his alcoholism." (see https://stepstudy.org/1934-bill-wilsons-hot-flash/).
In the spring of 1820 Joseph Smith went into a grove of trees in upstate New York and saw two Personages in a pillar of light. Joseph describes, "I saw a pillar of light exactly over my head, above the brightness of the sun, which descended gradually until it fell upon me. It no sooner appeared than I found myself delivered from the enemy which held me bound. . .One of them spake unto me, calling me by name and said, pointing to the other—This is My Beloved Son. Hear Him!" (Joseph Smith--History 1:16-17).
The parallel of both of them being delivered from an enemy, and both seeing a bright, white light is striking.
Later, Joseph and the early saints would travel to Ohio upon receiving revelation from the Lord and there would be established the new headquarters for the Church. Bill Wilson, a New York stockbroker, would travel on a business trip to Akron, Ohio. The trip challenged his newfound sobriety. He went to a payphone and called various clergymen in hopes of finding another drunk to talk to. He realized this was his only chance at staying sober. He found a washed up surgeon by the name of Bob Smith (same last name of Joseph in case you missed it). We call him Dr. Bob, who reluctantly said he would give Bill W. fifteen minutes of his time. The conversation lasted six hours.
There is an old church in Akron, Ohio where there is a sort of visitors center. AA meetings are held there around the clock--24/7.
The Steps Are Simple But Not Easy
I remember that first week of AA meetings and eyeing the steps. I said to myself, "Let's see, I'll be on that step by next Thursday, and I'll just go ahead and say that prayer and be done with it." It may be a simple request, but it's not that easy. This is a tough step.
Knowing I would be writing about this step, I decided to really try to work it this past week. I thought about how long it's been since I sincerely tried a Step Seven prayer. So on Monday I asked Heavenly Father to remove my shortcomings, hoping for drastic results within the week so I could share some profound spiritual experience. I kinda forgot that impatience ranks about third on my Step Four list of character defects. So if He were to grant my request immediately, as I wished, there would still be left at least one glaring defect. I can sum up 27 years of trying to work this step with something a good friend shared many years ago at an AA meeting. I will call him "John" to protect his anonymity. At this time he had close to fifteen years of continuous sobriety. John had a wife and a daughter. He said something like, "Fifteen years ago I could think of no one but myself. I had to look out for John. But after fifteen years of working the steps and spiritual progress, I can now stop and think about my wife or my daughter for maybe three or four minutes. Then I have to start thinking about John again." Like chapter five in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous states, "We believe in spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection."
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