One step leads into the next, and in Mosiah 4 verse 2, the sequence continues. Step Four's moral inventory reveals both character strengths and weaknesses. The discovery of those root character defects brings us to the confessions of Step Five, and the realization of our true character sparks a desire for a change of heart.
AA Step Six: "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character."
LDS Guide to Addiction Recovery Step Six: "Become entirely ready to have God remove all your character weaknesses."
LDS Key Principle for Step Six: Change of heart.
King Benjamin: "And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men" (Mosiah 4:2).
"And again, believe that ye must repent of your sins and forsake them, and humble yourselves before God; and ask in sincerity of heart that he would forgive you; and now, if you believe all these things see that ye do them" (Mosiah 4:10).
I remember that first week of AA meetings as I browsed through the steps, wondering how long it would take me to graduate from this program. My first estimate was maybe a week to cruise through these Twelve Steps. But when it came time to work Step Six, it stood before me like an insurmountable brick wall. Twenty-seven years later, I'm still begging God to please remove those character defects. And sadly, sometimes when He does, I simply take back my own will.
The bad news was that I would have to surrender all my character defects and pet sins, some of which I had learned to conveniently rely on, while others I just plain liked and didn't want to give up. The good news is that it isn't up to me. It's not my job to change my heart. That's a job only the Savior can perform.
Fortunately for King Benjamin's subjects, and for us, there was a pre-written speech delivered by a heavenly messenger in the preceding chapter, and this sublime message is centered on the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Remember that in Step Five we admitted "the exact nature of our wrongs." And therein lies the problem. It is housed in our nature, and the enemy is the "natural man."
An oft-quoted verse from King Benjamin's speech reads,
"For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father" (Mosiah 3:19).
This verse tells us how long we will be stuck on Step Six if we try to work it the wrong way. If I try to do this alone, based on my own merits, I will be stuck on this step "forever and ever." But if I "let go and let God" and get out of the way, and let my Savior heal me, then He can do miracles. I know because I have seen them happen in my life and in the lives of many others. It's one of the great blessings of recovery.
Today has been a surreal day. My wonderful daughter is a missionary serving in the Canada Edmonton Mission. Exactly ten days ago, her first companion and trainer returned home to our own ward after completing a successful mission. I know--what are the odds of getting your first companion and trainer from your own home ward with over 71,000 missionaries? It's just another of those tender mercies of the Lord, and another witness of how He is in the details of our lives. Today she gave her report on her mission. One of the many profound things she said was how some say a mission can change one's life. But she prefers to think of this as an opportunity for the Savior to change a life. Indeed, only He can change a heart.
Sunday, April 23, 2017
Sunday, April 16, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step Five
A wise man who used to attend AA meetings with me once shared how his sponsor taught him to work the steps in order. His sponsor said to him, "And for dummies like you, they're numbered." I can't overstate the value of sponsorship. I heard some say, "If you are having problems working a step, then go back and rework the one before it." The steps become a spiritual progression. One step builds upon another. There is usually a willingness step before the action step.
Steps Four and Five are related so it's not surprising to see them spoken of in the same verse in Mosiah chapter 4. Here are the variations of this step:
AA Step Five: "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
LDS Addiction Recovery Guide: "Admit to yourself, to your Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ, to proper priesthood authority, and to another person the exact nature of your wrongs."
King Benjamin: "And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men" (Mosiah 4:2).
After the people had worked Step Four by taking their own personal, moral inventory, expressed in the Book of Mormon as "they had viewed themselves," they made an open, verbal confession aloud in the presence of God, each other, and their king. As the LDS Guide suggests, they make this confession in the name of Jesus Christ, and in the next chapter they will take His name upon themselves in a covenant relationship. King Benjamin gathers the people together as kings did anciently during the Feast of Tabernacles (Sukkot) as their king and priesthood leader. King Mosiah, who will be Benjamin's successor, will later give priesthood keys to Alma to establish churches (or wards and branches of the Church) throughout the land. The text says, "And it came to pass that king Mosiah granted unto Alma that he might establish churches throughout all the land of Zarahemla; and gave him power to ordain priests and teachers over every church" (Mosiah 25:19). So it's significant that this confession is made in the presence of their priesthood leader as well.
They had learned much about how to take this step from Step Four, as their inventory revealed the "exact nature" of their character defects. Their "living problem" (not drinking problem) was a result of their "carnal state" stemming back to the Fall, "the cause of all mankind becoming carnal, sensual, devilish" (Mosiah 16:3). And these people realize their only shot at recovery will come from the Atonement of Jesus Christ, allowing their hearts to be changed. With a changed heart, recovery becomes joyous, happy, and fulfilling, while just changing the behavior results in just another "dry drunk." They identify their Higher Power as Jesus Christ, and these people know and understand that their faith will activate His grace.
Because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the guidance of these steps, the people will come away with an eternal vision, and "through the infinite goodness of God, and the manifestations of his Spirit," they will have "great views" of their own potential and that of their brothers and sisters in the gospel (see Mosiah 5:3).
I remember working Steps Four and Five for the first time. Several months of sobriety had only given me tunnel vision. I was so focused on just staying sober that I could hardly see anything else in my future life. One day my bishop called me into his office. He had a list of endowed members of his ward who did not hold temple recommends. He had seen my name on that list for years, and as he regularly prayed about it, he felt through the Spirit that the timing was not right. But on this day, he prayed and received a prompting that the time had come for me to start working on returning to the temple. As he shared this experience with me and challenged me to return to the temple, I responded, "Well bishop, I think that's impossible. I'm an alcoholic." I really expected him to say, "Oh well, in that case, thanks for your time," and then excuse me from his office. But he didn't do that. Instead, he laid out a plan for me to get temple blessings back into my life and gave me a timetable for all of this.
I will always be grateful for the help of sponsors and bishops in working this step. Future inventories revealed other character defects and addictions, and I had this experience several times of going back to the bishop. Each time, my bishop gave me plans and goals to help me overcome addictions and other problems. Being able to receive the blessings of the temple has blessed my life in so many ways.
On this Easter Day I wish to express praise and gratitude for all the tender mercies of our Savior Jesus Christ, as I know that "but for the grace of God, there go I." I know on that first Easter weekend, in an olive garden and on a cross, He purchased recovery for me and countless others at a staggering price.
Steps Four and Five are related so it's not surprising to see them spoken of in the same verse in Mosiah chapter 4. Here are the variations of this step:
AA Step Five: "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."
LDS Addiction Recovery Guide: "Admit to yourself, to your Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ, to proper priesthood authority, and to another person the exact nature of your wrongs."
King Benjamin: "And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men" (Mosiah 4:2).
After the people had worked Step Four by taking their own personal, moral inventory, expressed in the Book of Mormon as "they had viewed themselves," they made an open, verbal confession aloud in the presence of God, each other, and their king. As the LDS Guide suggests, they make this confession in the name of Jesus Christ, and in the next chapter they will take His name upon themselves in a covenant relationship. King Benjamin gathers the people together as kings did anciently during the Feast of Tabernacles (Sukkot) as their king and priesthood leader. King Mosiah, who will be Benjamin's successor, will later give priesthood keys to Alma to establish churches (or wards and branches of the Church) throughout the land. The text says, "And it came to pass that king Mosiah granted unto Alma that he might establish churches throughout all the land of Zarahemla; and gave him power to ordain priests and teachers over every church" (Mosiah 25:19). So it's significant that this confession is made in the presence of their priesthood leader as well.
They had learned much about how to take this step from Step Four, as their inventory revealed the "exact nature" of their character defects. Their "living problem" (not drinking problem) was a result of their "carnal state" stemming back to the Fall, "the cause of all mankind becoming carnal, sensual, devilish" (Mosiah 16:3). And these people realize their only shot at recovery will come from the Atonement of Jesus Christ, allowing their hearts to be changed. With a changed heart, recovery becomes joyous, happy, and fulfilling, while just changing the behavior results in just another "dry drunk." They identify their Higher Power as Jesus Christ, and these people know and understand that their faith will activate His grace.
Because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the guidance of these steps, the people will come away with an eternal vision, and "through the infinite goodness of God, and the manifestations of his Spirit," they will have "great views" of their own potential and that of their brothers and sisters in the gospel (see Mosiah 5:3).
I remember working Steps Four and Five for the first time. Several months of sobriety had only given me tunnel vision. I was so focused on just staying sober that I could hardly see anything else in my future life. One day my bishop called me into his office. He had a list of endowed members of his ward who did not hold temple recommends. He had seen my name on that list for years, and as he regularly prayed about it, he felt through the Spirit that the timing was not right. But on this day, he prayed and received a prompting that the time had come for me to start working on returning to the temple. As he shared this experience with me and challenged me to return to the temple, I responded, "Well bishop, I think that's impossible. I'm an alcoholic." I really expected him to say, "Oh well, in that case, thanks for your time," and then excuse me from his office. But he didn't do that. Instead, he laid out a plan for me to get temple blessings back into my life and gave me a timetable for all of this.
I will always be grateful for the help of sponsors and bishops in working this step. Future inventories revealed other character defects and addictions, and I had this experience several times of going back to the bishop. Each time, my bishop gave me plans and goals to help me overcome addictions and other problems. Being able to receive the blessings of the temple has blessed my life in so many ways.
On this Easter Day I wish to express praise and gratitude for all the tender mercies of our Savior Jesus Christ, as I know that "but for the grace of God, there go I." I know on that first Easter weekend, in an olive garden and on a cross, He purchased recovery for me and countless others at a staggering price.
Sunday, April 9, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step Four
Steps Four through Nine are sometimes called the action steps. In Step One we admitted our powerlessness, in Step Two we began to develop faith in God and hope for personal healing, and Step Three becomes the decision step to trust the Lord. In Step Four, the rubber meets the road. We partner with God to begin work on those action steps to guarantee healing and recovery.
AA Step Four: "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
LDS Addiction Recovery Guide Step Four: "Make a searching and fearless written moral inventory of yourself."
King Benjamin: "And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men" (Mosiah 4:2).
Each person "viewed himself" (or herself) and took a personal moral inventory, revealing the character defects causing the outward addictive behavior. Another group of people in the Book of Mormon suffered great loss, similar to addicts having lost everything meaningful in their lives, and their moral inventory was described as follows:
"And it was because of the pride of their hearts, because of their exceeding riches, yea, it was because of their oppression to the poor, withholding their food from the hungry, withholding their clothing from the naked, and smiting their humble brethren upon the cheek, making a mock of that which was sacred, denying the spirit of prophecy and of revelation, murdering, plundering, lying, stealing, committing adultery, rising up in great contentions, and deserting away into the land of . . . " (please fill in the blank for your addiction of choice; see Helaman 4:12).
Outsiders may see only the results of the addiction and the drug of choice. It's that place we run to, instead of turning to Christ. But the root of the behaviors are in the moral inventory. In the case above, the list includes pride, selfishness, disregard for others, making a mockery of sacred things, denial, dishonesty, and contention.
I remember that first week of AA meetings. I wanted to learn how to "manage" my drinking, then graduate and move on with life. I figured it would take me about a week to knock out these Twelve Steps, then I could graduate and move on. Twenty seven years later, I'm still trying to work the Steps and I feel like I have just scratched the surface.
I didn't realize I suffer from the disease of alcoholism. And it's not the alcohol that gets me--it's the ism at the end of the word. And I learned in AA that ISM stands for I, Self, Me. So I needed a personal inventory to discover my "living problem" rather than my alcohol problem. I didn't discover the "bad news" of Step Four until years down the road, as I learned over time I had many addictions (too numerous to list here), and it was the same moral inventory at the root of each addiction.
Recently, I have tried to tackle another addiction, as my wife and I are sponsoring each other in Weight Watchers. I was doing great until about a week ago when I relapsed on chocolate.
A few weeks ago, my daughter, currently serving in the Canada Edmonton Mission, challenged me to prepare questions in advance of General Conference last week. One of my questions was "How can I deepen my discipleship?" The answer came from wonderful talks, including a great talk specifically about discipleship by Elder Hales, and the whisperings of the Spirit telling me I need to overcome my "own carnal state" and my tendencies for pride, selfishness, impatience, immediate gratification, and other character defects found in working Step Four. The bad news is that I cannot overcome my own carnal state. The good news is that by "applying the atoning blood of Christ" I can overcome all things.
AA Step Four: "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
LDS Addiction Recovery Guide Step Four: "Make a searching and fearless written moral inventory of yourself."
King Benjamin: "And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men" (Mosiah 4:2).
Each person "viewed himself" (or herself) and took a personal moral inventory, revealing the character defects causing the outward addictive behavior. Another group of people in the Book of Mormon suffered great loss, similar to addicts having lost everything meaningful in their lives, and their moral inventory was described as follows:
"And it was because of the pride of their hearts, because of their exceeding riches, yea, it was because of their oppression to the poor, withholding their food from the hungry, withholding their clothing from the naked, and smiting their humble brethren upon the cheek, making a mock of that which was sacred, denying the spirit of prophecy and of revelation, murdering, plundering, lying, stealing, committing adultery, rising up in great contentions, and deserting away into the land of . . . " (please fill in the blank for your addiction of choice; see Helaman 4:12).
Outsiders may see only the results of the addiction and the drug of choice. It's that place we run to, instead of turning to Christ. But the root of the behaviors are in the moral inventory. In the case above, the list includes pride, selfishness, disregard for others, making a mockery of sacred things, denial, dishonesty, and contention.
I remember that first week of AA meetings. I wanted to learn how to "manage" my drinking, then graduate and move on with life. I figured it would take me about a week to knock out these Twelve Steps, then I could graduate and move on. Twenty seven years later, I'm still trying to work the Steps and I feel like I have just scratched the surface.
I didn't realize I suffer from the disease of alcoholism. And it's not the alcohol that gets me--it's the ism at the end of the word. And I learned in AA that ISM stands for I, Self, Me. So I needed a personal inventory to discover my "living problem" rather than my alcohol problem. I didn't discover the "bad news" of Step Four until years down the road, as I learned over time I had many addictions (too numerous to list here), and it was the same moral inventory at the root of each addiction.
Recently, I have tried to tackle another addiction, as my wife and I are sponsoring each other in Weight Watchers. I was doing great until about a week ago when I relapsed on chocolate.
A few weeks ago, my daughter, currently serving in the Canada Edmonton Mission, challenged me to prepare questions in advance of General Conference last week. One of my questions was "How can I deepen my discipleship?" The answer came from wonderful talks, including a great talk specifically about discipleship by Elder Hales, and the whisperings of the Spirit telling me I need to overcome my "own carnal state" and my tendencies for pride, selfishness, impatience, immediate gratification, and other character defects found in working Step Four. The bad news is that I cannot overcome my own carnal state. The good news is that by "applying the atoning blood of Christ" I can overcome all things.
Sunday, April 2, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step Three
For alcoholics and addicts like me, Step Three is a pivotal step. I've heard it said in meetings, the first three steps can be summarized with three short sentences: I can't. He can. I will let Him. Step Three is the leap of faith--the surrender step. Really, they're all about surrender.
The transition from Step Two to Step Three does not always go smoothly, and King Benjamin's treatment of the steps can help make the transition seamless. In case you're reading this one first, all Twelve Steps are clearly taught in Mosiah chapter 4.
AA Step Three: "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."
LDS Addiction Recovery Program Step Three: "Decide to turn your will and your life over to the care of God the Eternal Father and His Son, Jesus Christ."
LDS Addiction Recovery Program key concept for Step Three: "Trust in God."
King Benjamin: "I say unto you, if ye have come to a knowledge of the goodness of God, and his matchless power, and his wisdom, and his patience, and his long-suffering towards the children of men; and also, the atonement which has been prepared from the foundation of the world, that thereby salvation might come to him that should put his trust in the Lord, and should be diligent in keeping his commandments, and continue in the faith even unto the end of his life, I mean the life of the mortal body—" (Mosiah 4:6).
I remember my first time attending the Wednesday Night Old Timers Meeting over 27 years ago. I had not seen a single sober day in seven years. And this was my first time attending this AA meeting with a bunch of old timers. I certainly couldn't be called an "old timer." I didn't have a single day of sobriety.
The large poster with the Twelve Steps--the same one I had stopped to read on a summer morning two years earlier--had now been moved to our meeting room upstairs. God had placed it downstairs for me two years earlier, knowing I would stop to read it. I read Step Three over and over again. I thought I must have read it wrong. Wait a minute here, I signed up only to learn to manage my drinking, so what's all this stuff about giving up my will and my whole life? Then in a room full of drunks I counted the cost. Do I have to give Him my will and my life just to get sober?
I definitely had trust issues (my wife says I still do). I had already turned my life and will over to the god of alcohol, and now had admitted in Step One I was powerless over it. And what did I have to show for it? Oh, a couple of DUI's, trips to jail, threats at work, damaged relationships, low self-esteem, fear, shame, guilt, hopelessness, etc., etc. I had dedicated my life to the cause of alcoholism, and even shown up at the liquor store in advance before every Sunday and holiday for the last seven years. So I'll be darned if they think I'm going to surrender to anyone or anything! I started looking for what the Big Book calls "an easier, softer way."
So I decided to do "a half measure." I went to meetings every day for two weeks and continued to drink between meetings. July 31,1989 (my sobriety date from alcohol and drugs) rolled around and I went home from my third Monday Night Beginners Meeting filled with despair and anguish. I told myself I either needed to get out of AA, or get serious about this step and surrender myself to God. And my damaged concept of God was a Being somewhere out there in the universe waiting with vengeance for me, so He could just zap me a good one for all the terrible things I had done.
I went home that night, retired to my room, and had an hour-long battle with the enemy. Funny he should show up. He already abandoned me when I hit rock bottom. Finally, I hit my knees and poured out my soul to God. My dear daughter (an impossible concept 28 years ago) who is presently serving the Lord in the Canada Edmonton Mission, challenged me ahead of this weekend's General Conference to prepare my questions for conference. One of my questions was "How can I make my personal prayers more meaningful?" I want you to know this prayer over 27 years ago was short but powerful. It was something like, "Dear God, I'm beat. Help me!" It had real "energy of heart" (Moroni 7:48). I felt a peace I didn't understand at the time. I had done nothing to deserve it. I didn't hear a voice, but if I had, it would have said, "Don't worry, everything will be just fine."
As I listened last night to President Eyring describe an event while he was bishop when a member of his ward crashed into a bank lobby while drunk and said to the security officers, "Don't shoot. I'm a Mormon," I laughed and said to my wife and son (two more impossible concepts 28 years ago), "That sounds like something I would have done." Then I got to hear as you might have heard how President Eyring was privileged to see this man as the Savior sees him.
One of my other pre-conference questions was, "How can I deepen my discipleship?" Before the conference started yesterday morning I was out on my Saturday walk and going over these questions in my mind. When I asked this question, the Spirit quietly replied, "Trust me." No, I still didn't hear a voice, but the Spirit let me see patterns of my own thoughts and how my own thinking and behavior sometimes block the assurances of God. I've heard much yesterday and today about trusting the Lord and His timing and wisdom, including that great talk this morning by Elder Clayton.
I have to say today that the best decision I have ever made (and I have to keep making it every day) is to "let go and let God."
Enjoy conference!
Sunday, March 26, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step Two
This is the second in a series of the Twelve Steps of recovery as taught by King Benjamin in the Book of Mormon. These are all taught in Mosiah chapter 4. We will compare the AA Step, the LDS Guide to Addiction Recovery, and King Benjamin's teachings.
AA Step 2: "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity."
LDS Addiction Guide: "Come to believe that the power of God can restore you to complete spiritual health."
King Benjamin thoroughly teaches this step. It is a concept of faith. The LDS guide summarizes each step with a word or phrase, and this step is labeled "Hope."
King Benjamin teaches this concept of a correct belief in God's power with the following verse:
"Believe in God; believe that he is, and that he created all things, both in heaven and in earth; believe that he has all wisdom, and all power, both in heaven and in earth; believe that man doth not comprehend all the things which the Lord can comprehend" (Mosiah 4:9).
I believe that every new addict who comes into Twelve Step recovery has a faith problem. One of my recovery heroes was a local man from Springville. Of course, when I attended Springville High School, everyone called Springville the drug capital of the world (or so it seemed from some of the stories and newspaper articles). This man was an atheist, so this step of believing in a Higher Power was difficult for him. He did the best he could. He found an old coffee can and nailed it on a post in his barn. He put it way up high so it could be his "Higher Power." He would go out in the mornings and talk to his Higher Power. Over time these conversations became intimate and he began to have feelings deep in his soul. He knew that coffee can could not produce the feelings he was experiencing. There had to be Someone out there who cared deeply for him. I remember him sharing in an AA meeting of how his concept of a Higher Power had changed. I remember him saying, "Today, I believe in a loving Father."
My own belief crisis was much different. I had gained a testimony of the Gospel many years earlier, and years of alcoholism and drinking, as much as I wanted to drown my testimony, it just wouldn't go away. As a missionary in Germany, I had witnessed miracles wrought by God. My testimony at that time was purely academic. I didn't feel anything.
I remember those first few AA meetings, how I looked at the Steps and they all had this scary three-letter word--"God." I knew He was out there somewhere in the universe, ready to zap me at any time. I was certain He had written me off a long time ago and wanted nothing to do with me. I listened to other alcoholics talk about their upbringing, how they were abused and came from broken homes. I came from a loving, wonderful home with the best parents in the world, and was a return missionary. Surely, God would help and forgive these poor heathens who never had a chance, but I thought He would never forgive me.
I pick up where I left off last week--at that first AA meeting on July 17,1989. After I choked out those awful words, "My name is Brad, and I'm an alcoholic," I thought to myself, "Now what do I do?" I have to tell you that Step One by itself is not a good place to be. Yes, I was beat up. Yes, I was powerless. But what could I do? I thought maybe the best I could hope for was to quickly poison myself. I had no hope.
At the end of the meeting we stood up, formed a circle holding hands, and recited the Serenity Prayer. By the way, making a circle and reciting a prayer in unison somehow rang true to my soul and caused my mind to recall better days. I remembered reading this poem in a hippie shop--you know, the kind where they sell incense and black light posters--"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference." The next part literally shocked me. Everyone in the circle (except me) chanted, "Keep coming back. It works!" For a brief moment, a circle of drunks became my "Higher Power" and an entire belief system. My eyes scanned the faces in the circle for validation. I saw smiles on the faces and a brighter hope in their eyes. It was enough hope to get me to the Lunch Bunch Meeting the next day.
When the meeting was over, these same "drunks" all rallied to my aid with their phone numbers and pledges to help me--someone they had never seen before. I had to ask myself why.
Just because a problem or an addiction seems insurmountable, doesn't mean the Lord can't solve it. King Benjamin teaches "man doth not comprehend all the things which the Lord can comprehend." If the very Creator of the universe can create heaven and earth and "has all wisdom and power," then maybe He might have a shot at helping a drunk like me. By the way, God possesses all wisdom and power. In Step Eleven we are asked to pray for knowledge and power. He is the source. I know that today.
AA Step 2: "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity."
LDS Addiction Guide: "Come to believe that the power of God can restore you to complete spiritual health."
King Benjamin thoroughly teaches this step. It is a concept of faith. The LDS guide summarizes each step with a word or phrase, and this step is labeled "Hope."
King Benjamin teaches this concept of a correct belief in God's power with the following verse:
"Believe in God; believe that he is, and that he created all things, both in heaven and in earth; believe that he has all wisdom, and all power, both in heaven and in earth; believe that man doth not comprehend all the things which the Lord can comprehend" (Mosiah 4:9).
I believe that every new addict who comes into Twelve Step recovery has a faith problem. One of my recovery heroes was a local man from Springville. Of course, when I attended Springville High School, everyone called Springville the drug capital of the world (or so it seemed from some of the stories and newspaper articles). This man was an atheist, so this step of believing in a Higher Power was difficult for him. He did the best he could. He found an old coffee can and nailed it on a post in his barn. He put it way up high so it could be his "Higher Power." He would go out in the mornings and talk to his Higher Power. Over time these conversations became intimate and he began to have feelings deep in his soul. He knew that coffee can could not produce the feelings he was experiencing. There had to be Someone out there who cared deeply for him. I remember him sharing in an AA meeting of how his concept of a Higher Power had changed. I remember him saying, "Today, I believe in a loving Father."
My own belief crisis was much different. I had gained a testimony of the Gospel many years earlier, and years of alcoholism and drinking, as much as I wanted to drown my testimony, it just wouldn't go away. As a missionary in Germany, I had witnessed miracles wrought by God. My testimony at that time was purely academic. I didn't feel anything.
I remember those first few AA meetings, how I looked at the Steps and they all had this scary three-letter word--"God." I knew He was out there somewhere in the universe, ready to zap me at any time. I was certain He had written me off a long time ago and wanted nothing to do with me. I listened to other alcoholics talk about their upbringing, how they were abused and came from broken homes. I came from a loving, wonderful home with the best parents in the world, and was a return missionary. Surely, God would help and forgive these poor heathens who never had a chance, but I thought He would never forgive me.
I pick up where I left off last week--at that first AA meeting on July 17,1989. After I choked out those awful words, "My name is Brad, and I'm an alcoholic," I thought to myself, "Now what do I do?" I have to tell you that Step One by itself is not a good place to be. Yes, I was beat up. Yes, I was powerless. But what could I do? I thought maybe the best I could hope for was to quickly poison myself. I had no hope.
At the end of the meeting we stood up, formed a circle holding hands, and recited the Serenity Prayer. By the way, making a circle and reciting a prayer in unison somehow rang true to my soul and caused my mind to recall better days. I remembered reading this poem in a hippie shop--you know, the kind where they sell incense and black light posters--"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference." The next part literally shocked me. Everyone in the circle (except me) chanted, "Keep coming back. It works!" For a brief moment, a circle of drunks became my "Higher Power" and an entire belief system. My eyes scanned the faces in the circle for validation. I saw smiles on the faces and a brighter hope in their eyes. It was enough hope to get me to the Lunch Bunch Meeting the next day.
When the meeting was over, these same "drunks" all rallied to my aid with their phone numbers and pledges to help me--someone they had never seen before. I had to ask myself why.
Just because a problem or an addiction seems insurmountable, doesn't mean the Lord can't solve it. King Benjamin teaches "man doth not comprehend all the things which the Lord can comprehend." If the very Creator of the universe can create heaven and earth and "has all wisdom and power," then maybe He might have a shot at helping a drunk like me. By the way, God possesses all wisdom and power. In Step Eleven we are asked to pray for knowledge and power. He is the source. I know that today.
Sunday, March 19, 2017
King Benjamin Teaches Step One
For those of us in Twelve Step recovery it's significant that King Benjamin teaches all Twelve Steps of recovery in his famous address in the Book of Mormon. They are actually all contained and explained in great detail with excellent commentary in Mosiah chapter 4. The timing of this event and the entire text being centered on becoming a king or queen, like the Heavenly King (Mosiah 2:19), and the events following in Mosiah 5 as they become spiritually begotten sons and daughters of Jesus Christ through a covenant relationship, should be of paramount interest to LDS addicts in recovery.
I'm gonna get stuck on this chapter for a while and cover all Twelve Steps as they appear in his speech, comparing them with the original Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and the steps used in the LDS Addiction Recovery Program.
Today, we will look at Step One.
AA Step 1: " We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable."
LDS Addiction Guide Step 1: "Admit that you, of yourself, are powerless to overcome your addictions and that your life has become unmanageable."
Several verses in Mosiah chapter 4 relate to this idea of being powerless, especially in comparison with God's infinite power. Here a few examples:
"And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men" (Mosiah 4:2).
"For behold, if the knowledge of the goodness of God at this time has awakened you to a sense of your nothingness, and your worthless and fallen state—" (Mosiah 4:5).
"And again I say unto you as I have said before, that as ye have come to the knowledge of the glory of God, or if ye have known of his goodness and have tasted of his love, and have received a remission of your sins, which causeth such exceedingly great joy in your souls, even so I would that ye should remember, and always retain in remembrance, the greatness of God, and your own nothingness, and his goodness and long-suffering towards you, unworthy creatures, and humble yourselves even in the depths of humility, calling on the name of the Lord daily, and standing steadfastly in the faith of that which is to come, which was spoken by the mouth of the angel" (Mosiah 4:11).
Words and phrases like "less than the dust of the earth," "nothingness," "worthless and fallen state," and "unworthy creatures" definitely portray a feeling of being powerless. However, King Benjamin's intent is not to discourage us, but rather to compare the difference between a life with God and a life without Him.
I was first exposed to Step One almost thirty years ago on a warm summer morning in 1987 as I was walking to work. I was walking to work to avoid getting another DUI. About halfway there I encountered a building with a sign that said "Alano Club." My only interest was the word "Club" as I had been in several "clubs" and they were all drinking establishments. And seven o'clock in the morning was as good as any time to have a drink or two, or ten, or whatever, in my sick mind.
As I attempted to enter, I found the building was locked, but the morning sunlight illuminated two large posters with the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous. For some unknown reason, I was compelled to read through them all. Only three words in Step One made any sense to me, and the words were "powerless over alcohol." I asked myself if I really was powerless over alcohol. But I have to tell you, I had one killer denial program, so over the next three miles I told myself that surely I could quit drinking whenever I was ready to do it. It had been five years since I had seen a sober day.
Like with any practicing alcoholic or addict, life got worse. I did two more years of "research" as we call it in AA, and racked up a seven-year stint without a single sober day. By this time my life was spinning recklessly out of control, and I was ready to quit. I made promises to quit, but soon found I was totally powerless over alcohol, and was "less than the dust of the earth" in my efforts to stop drinking.
On July 17, 1989 after another blackout drunk I was heading home and driving by the same Alano Club when the words "powerless over alcohol" somehow popped into my mind. I pulled into the parking lot without a meeting schedule or any concept of an AA meeting, and found that coincidentally the Monday Night Beginners Meeting would be starting in ten minutes. What a tender mercy from God!
And speaking of tender mercies, a man walked up to me at that meeting and said, "Do you have a drinking problem?" I said, "Yes." He said, "Sit down, you're in the right place." That good dear man has now passed on to the spirit world, but his son is the current facilitator at the LDS Twelve Step meeting I go to. The Lord has a way to remind us of His grace.
About twenty minutes into that meeting, I choked out those very difficult, but honest words, "My name is Brad, and I'm an a-a-al- alc-o-hol-ic." I didn't realize it at the time, but recovery was just beginning for me.
I'm gonna get stuck on this chapter for a while and cover all Twelve Steps as they appear in his speech, comparing them with the original Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and the steps used in the LDS Addiction Recovery Program.
Today, we will look at Step One.
AA Step 1: " We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable."
LDS Addiction Guide Step 1: "Admit that you, of yourself, are powerless to overcome your addictions and that your life has become unmanageable."
Several verses in Mosiah chapter 4 relate to this idea of being powerless, especially in comparison with God's infinite power. Here a few examples:
"And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men" (Mosiah 4:2).
"For behold, if the knowledge of the goodness of God at this time has awakened you to a sense of your nothingness, and your worthless and fallen state—" (Mosiah 4:5).
"And again I say unto you as I have said before, that as ye have come to the knowledge of the glory of God, or if ye have known of his goodness and have tasted of his love, and have received a remission of your sins, which causeth such exceedingly great joy in your souls, even so I would that ye should remember, and always retain in remembrance, the greatness of God, and your own nothingness, and his goodness and long-suffering towards you, unworthy creatures, and humble yourselves even in the depths of humility, calling on the name of the Lord daily, and standing steadfastly in the faith of that which is to come, which was spoken by the mouth of the angel" (Mosiah 4:11).
Words and phrases like "less than the dust of the earth," "nothingness," "worthless and fallen state," and "unworthy creatures" definitely portray a feeling of being powerless. However, King Benjamin's intent is not to discourage us, but rather to compare the difference between a life with God and a life without Him.
I was first exposed to Step One almost thirty years ago on a warm summer morning in 1987 as I was walking to work. I was walking to work to avoid getting another DUI. About halfway there I encountered a building with a sign that said "Alano Club." My only interest was the word "Club" as I had been in several "clubs" and they were all drinking establishments. And seven o'clock in the morning was as good as any time to have a drink or two, or ten, or whatever, in my sick mind.
As I attempted to enter, I found the building was locked, but the morning sunlight illuminated two large posters with the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous. For some unknown reason, I was compelled to read through them all. Only three words in Step One made any sense to me, and the words were "powerless over alcohol." I asked myself if I really was powerless over alcohol. But I have to tell you, I had one killer denial program, so over the next three miles I told myself that surely I could quit drinking whenever I was ready to do it. It had been five years since I had seen a sober day.
Like with any practicing alcoholic or addict, life got worse. I did two more years of "research" as we call it in AA, and racked up a seven-year stint without a single sober day. By this time my life was spinning recklessly out of control, and I was ready to quit. I made promises to quit, but soon found I was totally powerless over alcohol, and was "less than the dust of the earth" in my efforts to stop drinking.
On July 17, 1989 after another blackout drunk I was heading home and driving by the same Alano Club when the words "powerless over alcohol" somehow popped into my mind. I pulled into the parking lot without a meeting schedule or any concept of an AA meeting, and found that coincidentally the Monday Night Beginners Meeting would be starting in ten minutes. What a tender mercy from God!
And speaking of tender mercies, a man walked up to me at that meeting and said, "Do you have a drinking problem?" I said, "Yes." He said, "Sit down, you're in the right place." That good dear man has now passed on to the spirit world, but his son is the current facilitator at the LDS Twelve Step meeting I go to. The Lord has a way to remind us of His grace.
About twenty minutes into that meeting, I choked out those very difficult, but honest words, "My name is Brad, and I'm an a-a-al- alc-o-hol-ic." I didn't realize it at the time, but recovery was just beginning for me.
Sunday, March 12, 2017
Dual Meanings In Scripture
Often in scripture the reader encounters passages with two meanings. I used to struggle with these, wondering does it mean this, or does it mean that? I always wanted to pin down the symbolism especially. But the more I have read, the more I seem to be content with a more global approach.
This is especially true with Isaiah. He can be talking about premortal councils, and then two verses later, he's switched to the Millennium. An example of this would be Isaiah 7 where it says, "Behold, a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel" (Isaiah 7:14). We all know this to be a prophecy of Christ, and the name Immanuel could be no other as it means "God with us." But in context, this chapter is about Syria and Ephraim, the Northern Kingdom, who have formed an alliance to go against Judah. Two verses later, Isaiah is speaking about about short-term events, as he prophesies, "For before the child shall know to refuse the evil, and choose the good, the land that thou abhorrest shall be forsaken of both her kings" (v. 16). This part of the prophecy has to take place within nine years, allowing the virgin to conceive, bear the child, and having the child reach the years of accountability at age 8. So perhaps we have two virgins spoken of.
We have another example of dual meaning in the Book of Mormon. One verse, marking the time of the Savior's crucifixion, states, "And there was not any man who could do a miracle in the name of Jesus save he were cleansed every whit from his iniquity—" (3 Nephi 8:1). So does it mean one could not do a miracle in the name of Jesus unless he was cleansed of sin first, or does it mean that it is impossible to perform a miracle without that miracle having a cleansing effect on those involved? The answer is yes and yes. Both meanings apply.
I've learned it pays to read verses in their context. So we have another dual meaning in King Benjamin's speech, which is written chiastically with the most important focus of the message given in the central chapter, which is Mosiah chapter 3.
Of course the heart of the Gospel is the Atonement of Jesus Christ, and that is the central theme in Mosiah 3. By the way, we are given added insight into the false charges filed against Jesus, which have been brought to light by historical records and non-Biblical sources that suggest that one of the main charges filed against the Savior was that he allegedly used so-called "black magic" to perform miracles. These ideas are not well developed in the Bible, but the Book of Mormon gives the historical background that "they shall consider him a man, and say that he hath a devil, and shall scourge him, and shall crucify him" (Mosiah 3:9)
Then we are given profound doctrinal teachings about the Atonement and who it covers: those "who have died not knowing the will of God concerning them, or who have ignorantly sinned" (Mosiah 3:11). But there is another group spoken of, and that is little children. We often speak of those who die before the age of accountability as receiving celestial glory automatically since they cannot know good from evil. But the Book of Mormon corrects this false approach as it teaches, "And even if it were possible that little children could sin they could not be saved; but I say unto you they are blessed; for behold, as in Adam, or by nature, they fall, even so the blood of Christ atoneth for their sins" (Mosiah 3:16). They still experience the effects of the Fall, being born into mortality, and as part of this fallen state, they are cut off from the presence of God, speaking as if no atonement had taken place.
Then comes one of those famous, oft-quoted verses:
"For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father" (Mosiah 3:19).
The phrase "putteth off" in scripture means to change clothing (see 1 Samuel 17:39 as Saul gives David a coat of armor to fight Goliath and he takes it off since he has not proven it, and is clothed as a shepherd with a staff and five smooth stones). So the other half of this equation is in Galatians as Paul says, "For as many of you as have been baptized into Christ have put on Christ" (Galatians 3:27). By the way, the Greek word for "put on" is enduo, where we get the word endowment. We "put off" the natural man and "put on" Christ.
Going back to the Mosiah verse, does it mean that we become saints and put off the natural man by taking on childlike attributes, such as being submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, etc., or does it mean we put off the natural man by being like a child in that we allow ourselves to be ransomed by the blood of Christ, which atones for our sins? In the chapter context, it seems a more atonement centered concept would apply here. But the final answer is still yes and yes--both meanings apply.
This is especially true with Isaiah. He can be talking about premortal councils, and then two verses later, he's switched to the Millennium. An example of this would be Isaiah 7 where it says, "Behold, a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel" (Isaiah 7:14). We all know this to be a prophecy of Christ, and the name Immanuel could be no other as it means "God with us." But in context, this chapter is about Syria and Ephraim, the Northern Kingdom, who have formed an alliance to go against Judah. Two verses later, Isaiah is speaking about about short-term events, as he prophesies, "For before the child shall know to refuse the evil, and choose the good, the land that thou abhorrest shall be forsaken of both her kings" (v. 16). This part of the prophecy has to take place within nine years, allowing the virgin to conceive, bear the child, and having the child reach the years of accountability at age 8. So perhaps we have two virgins spoken of.
We have another example of dual meaning in the Book of Mormon. One verse, marking the time of the Savior's crucifixion, states, "And there was not any man who could do a miracle in the name of Jesus save he were cleansed every whit from his iniquity—" (3 Nephi 8:1). So does it mean one could not do a miracle in the name of Jesus unless he was cleansed of sin first, or does it mean that it is impossible to perform a miracle without that miracle having a cleansing effect on those involved? The answer is yes and yes. Both meanings apply.
I've learned it pays to read verses in their context. So we have another dual meaning in King Benjamin's speech, which is written chiastically with the most important focus of the message given in the central chapter, which is Mosiah chapter 3.
Of course the heart of the Gospel is the Atonement of Jesus Christ, and that is the central theme in Mosiah 3. By the way, we are given added insight into the false charges filed against Jesus, which have been brought to light by historical records and non-Biblical sources that suggest that one of the main charges filed against the Savior was that he allegedly used so-called "black magic" to perform miracles. These ideas are not well developed in the Bible, but the Book of Mormon gives the historical background that "they shall consider him a man, and say that he hath a devil, and shall scourge him, and shall crucify him" (Mosiah 3:9)
Then we are given profound doctrinal teachings about the Atonement and who it covers: those "who have died not knowing the will of God concerning them, or who have ignorantly sinned" (Mosiah 3:11). But there is another group spoken of, and that is little children. We often speak of those who die before the age of accountability as receiving celestial glory automatically since they cannot know good from evil. But the Book of Mormon corrects this false approach as it teaches, "And even if it were possible that little children could sin they could not be saved; but I say unto you they are blessed; for behold, as in Adam, or by nature, they fall, even so the blood of Christ atoneth for their sins" (Mosiah 3:16). They still experience the effects of the Fall, being born into mortality, and as part of this fallen state, they are cut off from the presence of God, speaking as if no atonement had taken place.
Then comes one of those famous, oft-quoted verses:
"For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father" (Mosiah 3:19).
The phrase "putteth off" in scripture means to change clothing (see 1 Samuel 17:39 as Saul gives David a coat of armor to fight Goliath and he takes it off since he has not proven it, and is clothed as a shepherd with a staff and five smooth stones). So the other half of this equation is in Galatians as Paul says, "For as many of you as have been baptized into Christ have put on Christ" (Galatians 3:27). By the way, the Greek word for "put on" is enduo, where we get the word endowment. We "put off" the natural man and "put on" Christ.
Going back to the Mosiah verse, does it mean that we become saints and put off the natural man by taking on childlike attributes, such as being submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, etc., or does it mean we put off the natural man by being like a child in that we allow ourselves to be ransomed by the blood of Christ, which atones for our sins? In the chapter context, it seems a more atonement centered concept would apply here. But the final answer is still yes and yes--both meanings apply.
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